At half time of the 5.30 kick off I went out to get the washing in. A few metres behind me a red kite and a pigeon smashed into the wall. The red kite did not give a fuck about me and went about its business. After ten minutes of being eaten the pigeon made a break for it and got taken down again and eaten on the other side of my garden. It was still alive about half an hour in. After an hour the red kite staggered off stuffed to the gills(?!) and flew off. We were left with a pigeon with a hole through the middle. Thankfully someone came in the night and took it away.
The next day we went to the county fair. During the beagle display I want to the loo leaving my bag with wife, friend and various kids. When I came back I was told that a beagle had come up to the fence and pissed on my bag (which was very wet). I did not receive a satisfactory answer as to why nobody moved it when the pissing started.
That’s all I’ve got, I think.