A cricket thread for NeWDiS 🦗

England’s test team’s going to look a bit odd isn’t it.
Missing 4 of a top 6 potentially.
#Cook!
Jennings?
Hameed (averaging ten or so this year)?
Gary @anon29812515?
#Root!
Hero Mo moving up?
Duckett?
Buttler?
Stokes (fit?)?
#Bairstow!
woakes crocked
Broad?
Anderson?
#Wood!
Rashid?
Tory Cumberbatch-Rowland-Smyth
Curran?
Anyone Else?
#Ball!

Would take Jennings over Hameed right now.

Ballance must be in with a shout to be at 4? Had a great summer thus far. Duckett? I know he notched a ton yesterday but am not convinced.

Cook
Jennings
Root
Ballance
Bairstow
Buttler
Stokes
Moeen
Broad
Wood
Anderson

Assuming all are fit.

I would like large lad Samit Patel to get a place, purely because of how long it’s been since a properly out of shape player’s had an England cap

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It’s going to look a bit fragile, isn’t it? Like you say, Hameed’s been in wretched nick, Jennings not much better, but I still think they’ll probably go Cook-Hameed-Jennings-Root at the top. Bairstow, Stokes, Ali, Broad, Anderson and Wood more or less pick themselves, so room for one more. Ballance has absolutely caned it all summer, so he might be the most obvious choice, Rashid if it’ll spin, but I just have a sneaky feeling for Ben Foakes to come in and keep as a left field option, let Bairstow worry about batting only.

Foakes is in terrific form, has played loads of Lions games, fills in admirably for Woakes in rhyming with Stokes, and plays for Surrey which can never be underestimated in the selectors’ minds.

There’s Nick Gubbins as a possible opener too, but we can’t be picking a player called Gubbins, clearly.

are they definitely going to be fit? Any chance of them going with Bairstow at 5 and Jossy Jos at 7? Big fat Samit Patel?

Oh Ben Foakes is from Colchester

GET HIM ON THE PLANE!

England’s Women have just smashed 377, noice

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Anderson is bowling as we speak. I think Broad will be fit. The Josster, I dunno, don’t see him in the squad at the moment, but could be wrong.

Mark Cosgrove must qualify for England by now if you really must have a fatty in the squad, has about as good a chance as Samit of being selected too.

Gosh, that’s a little bit of timber, that is.

Top lad - hope for us all yet!

Oh my!
Samit’s been biffing it around in all forms recently hasn’t he?
Still can’t get over the interview he gave about how he was going to really commit to getting into shape and focusing on the athletic side of the game, while eating a KFC during the interview

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Back to back double centuries in the CC no less, but he (along with the rest of Notts) is just on holiday in div 2 for a year, they were against the might of Leics and Gloucs, two of the shittest bowling attacks assembled in recent memory. He has quite literally no chance of being called up, which is a bit sad really.

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Oof. That’s a big old score in the women’s game. One off their best ever, against… Pakistan, last year.

Happily for the Pakistan team, they’re used to it.

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Australia’s Women’s team seem like they were fairly dominant in the late 90s

Oh jesus fucking humble christ this is bleak

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including a 32 ball duck in an ODI, amazing scenes

less than 1 an over for the innings

Oh my. I mean… oh my. I hope there were no children present.

“Pakistan Women tour of Australia, Only ODI.” Yes, I should think that was probably enough.

Not even their biggest defeat on that tour!

Quite the collapse from the Aussies there.

At the time the PAK-AUS game set world records for the highest and lowest team totals ever! (a more respectable 3rd highest and 2nd lowest ever, now)