A definitive list of punchlines

#1

He can’t; he’s got no nose!

(chat allowed)

#2

BOOM you looking for this

#3

i hardly know her!

#4

And with that, I yield.

#5

She went of her own accord!

#6

Even the cake’s in tiers!

#7

I was 32 years old.

#8

“Oh it’s nothing, I’m just an ex-tractor fan”

#9

I don’t get up til 9!

#10

Looks like you’ve blown a seal, mate

#11

Because he (k)needed a poo!

#12

FTFY

#13

Well done, he’s 12.

#14

The pilot, you racist.

#15

You’re 35 years old and you still believe in leprechauns?

#16

And funnily enough, it lands on its wheels, and it starts first time and they just drive away.

#17

The aristocrats

#18

THE ONE ON THE TANK

#19

Thanks. I can always be relied on to fuck up a punchline. This is why I never tell jokes.

#20

“and then I got off the bus!”

“and that was just the teachers!”
(actually heard a stand-up use this one the other week)