A Question of Pedantry (No longer purelyabout pedantry) - edited

Ok,here’s the ridiculous premise.

By law* you must forgo all but three of your pet peeves. Choose them wisely, from midnight tonight you may only sigh, scowl and seek to correct those three things.

What are you choosing?

*instigated by some prick, I don’t know, let’s say sadpunk.

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I’ll reply in a few when I see other replies so I can better understand what yer on about


Yeah I thought this. Not sure I fully understand - can you give an example?

If I’m only allowed to keep three then I need them to become punishable by death for a first offence. This is my red Corbyn line.

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  • Car drivers not using their indicators at roundabouts
  • Vegetable peelings (etc) being left on kitchen towel until it gets wet and loses structural integrity
  • People fucking up self-service checkouts and/or self-service passport things

Ok. Here’s mine.

People saying haitch rather than aitch.

People saying jealous when they mean envious.

Cyclists ignoring zebra crossings.

Hmm okay. Going to be a head scratcher there but I would like to take this opportunity to say cyclist on pavements are wankers

Sentence also valid without the “on pavements”

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  • Cycling through red lights under any circumstances, short of imminent threat of death.

  • Using the word disinterested when uninterested is what is meant.

  • Using a mobile phone in any way at all that I deem annoying. [Sorry if I only get three then I have to get my money’s worth out of this one.]

This was initially going to be about minor things that others would say were unimportant hence the “question of pedantry” but since Epimer has come in with his general pet peeves this dreadful thread may as well be thrown wide open.

  1. middle lane drivers. Will never not be annoying.

  2. people who are stopped on a mostly empty pavement (looking at phone or whatever) and start walking again just as you walk past, so you end up pretty much walking together. Stop it.

  3. the other auditors from different companies who I routinely share office space with at different sites (don’t know them, will prob never see them a second time) but don’t mute their laptops so you hear every single cursor move, error tone and new email alert. All day long. Stop it.

fuck off mate life’s too short

what about keys?

  • My lack of a private jet, island and general unlimited money.
  • Getting out of shape/feeling sick if I just eat pizza and ice cream all the time
  • Not being able to travel through time

Can’t wait to get all this sorted, thanks man.

None of this is getting sorted.

These are the only things you can moan about from midnight tonight.


Enjoy your remaining 11 hours and 50 minutes being able to moan about other stuff.

This thread is the pits!

my wife says pocket of my coat instead of coat pocket!

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Do you want to swap one out for that?

“cyclist are wankers”?

That’s all well and good until I pick my “fucking up tenses and numbers clauses grammar nazism” as one of mine, and get you hanged along with pricks using ‘text’ instead of ‘texted’.