A thread about general digestion and toilet times 🚽

This is meant to be a SSP thread but I couldn’t work out how to make it social and SSP? Is that a thing? Anyway, I feel like it’s an issue a lot of us have to deal with. Not a particularly dignified topic but something most of us deal with.


I’m a person who has a womb and ovaries and because of that, when I have a period it’s fucking painful! Really horrendously bad! Ouch!

But also, I make a conscious effort to try and have bran flakes for breakfast, and wholewheat bread, and brown rice, and just generally high fibre carbs but nothing seems to help. I just don’t have nice times when I am in the bathroom. I don’t drink a huge amount of alcohol, I stopped smoking over a year ago, I don’t tend to put anything into myself that you would think would exacerbate this. I’m starting a food diary, but there doesn’t seem to be any obvious factor. I even do turmeric shots and take multivitamins specifically for digestive health!!

Weirdly though, when I have a weekend “off the wagon” and I drink loads of wine and eat like, Taco Bell or whatever, my bathroom trips seem much easier. Surely there’s no way that my body prefers that to like… lots of water and vegetables. SURELY.

Anyway. Potentially just speaking for myself here but I don’t think it should be embarrassing that some of us in this life were dealt a hand that means we just have bad poops all the time.

Tell of your poops and poop remedies. Let’s talk about it, we’re all friends here

Well I’d have put money on this being a Jook thread you know.

:kissing_heart: thanks @Funkhouser xx


My toilet times have improved beyond measure since I got a Squatty Potty.


oh SSP soz

1 Like

I have extremely good poops now that I:

  • cut out lactose, and basically all dairy that isn’t incidental butter in things
  • stopped eating meat
  • rarely drink
  • eat mostly plants
  • avoid eating lots of peppers, especially uncooked or not very cooked peppers
  • don’t go nuts with raw onion

Textbook now. Could set your watch by it.

Unless my nerves are getting the better of me in which case it’s a one way ticket to bumwee, population: me(wee)


Ooooh! Thank you for the tip!
I’ve seen about them online but hadn’t heard a testimonial from someone that I could be sure existed, but I will 100% order one tomorrow when I get paid.
Don’t worry, I shan’t PM you with my review

1 Like

This is genuinely wonderful to hear and I’m very pleased for you!

Yeah, during the week I try to limit my dairy intake (nut milks in coffee and cereal etc) but that doesn’t seem to make the blindest bit of difference.

I do enjoy a raw pepper and it makes me VERY ANGRY that a vegetable could be exacerbating issues.

Very much with you on the anxiety front. Should probably refill my medication prescription but I keep getting too anxious to call the doctor. Will do that once I’ve posted this actually, cause that does make it more frequent.

Dunno how to explain it without being really graphic (no one wants that), but it’s less that it’s bum wee and more that it’s just… Laborious?

Him indoors has a diagnosed issue so when I make dinner for us I make sure to make things that’ll be good for his gut health and make it easier for him, but it seems to make mine worse!! Angry!! I want a refund!!

I’ve had a torrid time of it in the last 10 years and all of my own making. I’ll spoiler it but it’s a cautionary tale worth reading

I’d had roids for years and was no stranger to large amounts of blood in the toilet. Then one day I had this dull ache in my ass that got steadily worse and worse, the next day I woke up and I’d got a severe anal prolapse in the form of a small passion fruit sized section of intestine popping out my bum star.

I went to the GP and he said it needed surgery but I’d be waiting about 6 months for it. In the meantime I had an injection, some large oily suppositories, a lot of cream and 2 weeks off work sitting on a donut cushion.

6 months later I went under the knife and had it all sorted. I was under general but I was in these stirrups with my legs right up and my hole and bits on display for the pleasure of the surgery team. This was another 2 weeks of donut cushion and pain, then I’ve been ok since.

The kick in the teeth though was seeing the consultant as a follow up and finding out what caused it. It wasn’t bad diet or lifestyle, but id been pooing wrong my whole life. I thought you had to push it out so I’d been straining and squeezing until I’d literally turned myself inside out. Now I just sit down and it comes out.


What’s your water intake like?
Are you exercising?
If so, are you replenishing your salts?

I’m quite decent re: water tbf, I drink about a litre through the night alone :smiley:
My exercise isn’t amazing to be fair, I’m a bit of a lump. Try to do 5-30 mins on the on’ static bike of an evening but probably only do that four times a week. I don’t drive so I do walk everywhere, but not leaving the house as much as I used to. Exercise would definitely help wouldn’t it?

Thank you! X

Would love some advice for firming things up. My standard effort is pretty loose which is always annoying - more wiping, more brushing the toilet etc. Not sure if diet / stress / drinking or what. Only diet thing I notice that has an immediate impact is coffee.

Think I poop less often than I used to because at the office it was something to do, now I’m at home all the time there’s no need.

Also, spoilered for (even more) grossness,

I think because of overwiping there’s sometimes blood there, it’s not in the poo or a haemorrhoid (I think?) just like a recurring spot where it’s irritated enough to bleed. Maybe should see a doc idk

Good thread, sorry about the oversharing

I did some research a while back on periods and how it affects bowel movements and they’re very much linked, something about how the body is relaxing itself to expel the uterus lining and the bowels want to get in on that relaxing action too. Very inconvenient, as if the blood and pain and hormonal changes weren’t enough.

Speaking of poo, just remembered gillian mckeith and how she pretended to be a doctor and how much she loved a stool

So apparently you period is part of your immune system and it’s your digestion that speeds up when you’re on your period!

I thought it was my womb swelling or something and pushing on my bowels making it smaller


Re: the grossness, yeah happens to me sometimes when it’s a ‘wetter’ period. It is annoying. I end up putting E45 cream on my arsehole to try to help it recover and stuff.

@kermitwormit I’m honestly unsure what a ‘bad’ trip to the loo is. Are you just saying it’s a lot of strain?

Personally my issue these days is that I seem to not always be able to finish my wee off properly. I am often having to get up and do a final bit of a piss into the bowl. I’m not sure what causes that. Probably age?

But yeah, sometimes it’s a strain but mostly it’s on the wetter end of the scale for me. I have a lot of poos in a day I think. Like 2 or more normally.

1 Like

Given that I’m two hours away from starting fasting for a colonoscopy tomorrow I don’t really know where I’d start with this thread, but suffice to say there’s a whole lot can go wrong in baffling ways. Currently wondering if maybe I have a stomach ulcer.

If I do in my ankle we can be bodily issue twins.

Think we need to practice our kegels as well

1 Like

I do this a lot. I think the sitting position creates kinks in the lines and traps some piss inside.

1 Like

My diet consists entirely of:

Fruit (Bananas, Apples, Blueberries, Prunes, Tomatoes)
Vegetables (Cabbage, Green Beans, Brussels Sprouts, Broccoli)
Other Carbs (Chickpeas, Pinto Beans, Oatmeal, Air Popped Popcorn, Brown Rice, Barley, Potatoes)
Proteins (Eggs, Tofu, Whey)
Fats (Natural Peanut Butter, Almonds, Avocado, Olive Oil)

How many times do you think I go to the bathroom in a typical week?

  • 0 to 1
  • 1 to 2
  • 2 to 3
  • 3 to 4
  • 4 to 5
  • 5 to 6
  • 6 to 7
  • Greater than 7, less than 14
  • Greater than 14, less than 21
  • Perpetual Turd, I’m in hell

0 voters

Stay tuned for the exciting answer

Hey everyone I’ve been having SO much fun with my laxatives since 5pm. Hope this fun never ends.