Airport bants

Getting searched by the guy at security

“Buy me dinner first!”

Wahey!

4 Likes

Sitting down on the baggage collection belt, what am I like

3 Likes

While having your passport checked

“It is me, promise!”

(cheeky wink)

3 Likes

Walking the other way on the moving walkway

4 Likes

After ordering any food or drink

“How much!? I only asked for one!”

1 Like

“Did you pack this bag yourself?”

“Nah, I bought it like that!”

Oy oy

2 Likes

“Anything in your pockets sir?”

“Nah, just born that way!”

Back of the net!

1 Like

hijacking a plane but then saying ‘only joking’

20 Likes

When your e-passport doesn’t work and you tell the passport control officer “I must have a dodgy one”

Don’t fucking do this. The look she shot me after I blurted this out suggested I’d narrowly avoided an hour long interrogation about the origin of my (legitimately acquired) passport.

8 Likes

“Can I put my mask on? What am I, Jim Carrey?”

3 Likes

pilot seen sipping from a pint sized can of lager through the cockpit window in full view of boarding passengers and giving them the thumbs up.

5 Likes

saying ‘i think i packed my axe by mistake’ loudly at security

2 Likes

Smuggling an explosive device onto the plane

1 Like

Taking a selfie with a hijacker

#notaselfie

22 Likes

Wahey!

“The guy at the desk said we could get an upgrade”

doing finger guns at the armed cops saying ‘bratatata’.

4 Likes

Asking if you can take your son to the cockpit to see the pilot and then mashing all the buttons when you’re in there

1 Like

shouting ‘HES GOT A BOMB’ and then saying ‘not really, it was just banter’.

1 Like

Pressing the attention button and then asking “are we there yet!?”

6 Likes