Alan partridge related gifts to go in home made partridge crackers

#1

like so, but normal size

Alan-Partridge.png1200×630 687 KB

need some partridge related things to go in them - gonna do best lines of dialogue instead of jokes and that, suggestions welcome. what are some small & light things/toys i could shove in there that’d be funny too? looking at a 1:100 replica of a 12" plate? can’t think. i’ve left this very late but fuck it.

plz help.

#2

mini toblerone? tiny bottles of windscreen washer fluid? little cans of lynx?

#3

toblerone is a goer! with a little map to dundee!

#4

might fashion a tiny foot stuck on a spike?

#5

you could make mini versions of the alan partridge tie and blazer badge combination pack? (at least do the badge!)

#6

oh, tiny cans of sprünt!

#7

Superficially damaged Chocolate Oranges
A 2nd series

#8

where to get tiny cans tho?

#9

a fox’s glacier mint with the quote about bathrooms

#10

quotes mates, I need quotes and jokes and trivia

please and thanks

#11

handful of tungsten tip screws

#12

They should contain a torch, a Curly Wurly, a book of stamps, a digital watch with denim strap, a vodka miniature, a BIC-style razor, a miniature copy of the Daily Express… ooooh, it’s a good paper.

#13

Tiny framed picture of Dan

#14

Tiny amounts of baileys, g&t, and lager.

#15

got my brother a crate of beer anyway, if I can find a baileys & g&t small enough to fit in a cracker that’ll be a winner.

#16

And a couple of custard cream biscuits, plus the lead from a kettle.

#17

Not helpful, but we watched the KMKY,A! Christmas special while making xmas cards last weekend. It’s soooooo good.

#18

A mug of beans. With a sausage for a spoon.

#19

i like the enthusiasm but you haven’t considered the smell you bitch!

#20

Do you like owls?

You don’t want to see me in my underpants.

I had a scotch egg.

The string back just gives you a bit of extra purchase.

I’ve just been sawing some cereals.

Something else in Geordie.

Oooh, Ladyboys.