All the small things

I meant a round number, smartarse

Measuring stuff. Can pour something to the fill level almost dead on

Oh I tell you what. In the days of Guitar Hero, I used to be able to sing and play guitar on hard and get 100% to Blink 182’s Aliens Exist. I was so fucking good at it. So good.

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Peterborough. London Road.

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You could at least have changed the name of the file …


Can smash a Capri-Sun in 1.8 seconds.

fucks sake. I did, then used the wrong link.

Oh well, I reckon he got it without cheating.


No idea



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Oh yeah, right I’ve got it. I’m definitely in the top 0.001% of people on Earth at this:

If you can’t be bothered to watch the clip, it’s a guy auditioning on X Factor who’s “thing” is that he can hold a note for a really, really long time. He says he could do it even longer if he got through and Simon Cowell says that that is not possible.

I was watching with my gf at the time and said “that’s not that long, I could beat that easy” and she was like “bollocks”. So I broke into song - did the same song as him and held the same note at the same volume for what was AT LEAST three times longer than his. Absolutely no kidding. She actually got bored waiting for me to finish and left the room it was so fucking long.

I call bullshit on this. I mean, what if the bin were about 30 yards away?

Nothing, I am literally not brilliant at anything. I am the classic jack of all trades. I don’t have the dedication to become exceptional at anything, when I could be being OK- to- good at everything.

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30m/s headwind.

inexplicable typos.

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