An ex has just added me on LinkedIn


#1

I say ex, we had a few dates and a couple of snogs back in my OKCupid days, but still. Bit weird?


#2

I’m afraid that you are now obliged to go down on her.


#3

it’ll be one of those godawful moments where linkedin suddenly asks ‘hey add your entire inbox of contacts?’

and you’re clicking fast and NOOOOO


#4

Probably just done that thing where she’s let Linked In read her entire address book and invite everyone.


#5

She is a megababe… but I’m afraid I will not be able to fulfil this obligation. Shall I pass on your details?


#6

oh thanks Theo I hadn’t covered that


#7

Sorry but I am not on linkedin.


#8

Is @zxcvbnm?


#9

She’s probably done it deliberately as the first step in a plan to infiltrate every part of your life.


#10

Probably looking for a job from you, if you know what I mean.

A DESK job.

Eh? Eh?


#11

Bound to be. He’s just finishing off his archery session at the moment but should be along shortly.


#12

She’s actually gone from middling PR bod to senior comms person at household name organisation, so maybe she’s offering ME a job, ifyouknowwhatimean.


#13

Sorry, you’ve lost me.


#14

While we’re here, can someone tell me how the fuck you use LinkedIn after that big redesign they did recently? It’s completely lost me.

I feel very old.


#15

it’s just got different icons and messenger built in


#16

Can I still sort my news feed by newest? Because right now my second highest story is somebody wishing me a Happy International Women’s Day.


#17

and that makes you UNCOMFORTABLE?


#18

I… bye.


#19

Sunday 19th November, you pig.


#20

Provisional date for Winter I Fenino?