Any stories of good blagging?

Was thinking earlier of when my mate got into Long Division Festival in Wakefield because he convinced the ticket exchange that he had bought a ticket but his mate had eaten it. No idea how they bought that but it worked.

I would never be good at anything like that but there was a night out when I was about 17 which was doing a geek theme, and if you had dressed as a ‘geek’ you got queue jump and a free drink on entry. I was dressed in my normal clothes and it worked. Wasn’t sure what to think


Feel like I’ve blagged my way in to every job I’ve ever had.


The friend I go to football with is called Ian Wright, years ago we wanted tickets for the Palace v Sunderland play off semi final. At time I’d taken a few years off from going and we didn’t have the required points to get a ticket, and by the time it got to us it had sold out.
But he phoned and asked anyway, they asked his name and he replied “Ian Wright”, the person in the box office assumed he was the Ian Wright, and promptly said we can sell you a ticket in the directors box.

My friend promptly replied he wasn’t the Ian Wright, but as it’s available he’ll take it.


Wanted to crash a party at a village hall (one where alcohol was serviced, not like a pass the parcel type party). I can’t remember if it was something you were just invited to or if you bought a ticket and it was sold out but I didn’t have one

There was a hand stamp system in place so people could go outside to the garden area out back. I confidently showed the bouncer my hand, when he squinted at it I said it was “a bit rubbed off”. He let me in - there was no stamp at all!

Also the time I got asked for ID in the pub when underage (rare in my home town). I made a big show of looking in my wallet and going “oh no, I’ve left it at home”. She served me. Rigorous

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I got into Reading festival once with a traders wristband I bought for £20 from someone outside. Got stopped by security at the arena gate and was asked which trader I was working for. Thought fuck I’ve been rumbled so just pointed at the first stall I could see, which was Punky Fish, and said “I work for Punky Fish”. He seemed satisfied but then he asked how much I paid for the wristband. After thinking for a few seconds I replied “Nothing?” and he said ok and let me in.


did you get to watch it in the director’s box or did you get found out before?

My friend did work a Glastonbury once handing out wristbands but after the first shift on a Wednesday, just took his stuff from the work campsite and went with his mates and didn’t do another shift All they had taken was his drivers licence as a deposit and they sent that back to him still


Once got my hog roast roll upgraded to a baguette for free cause I convinced the guy serving me I was one half of the Rizzle Kicks


New driving licence is what £70? Definitely worth the risk.

The Palace directors box at that time wasn’t fancy at all. And wasn’t much more expensive than other parts of the ground. He actually admitted on the phone he wasn’t the famous Ian Wright, but still talked them into getting a ticket.

We actually did a season there the following year before moving back to the Holmesdale.

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Exactly, there may have been a slight fee to a ticket too but it was around 50 quid I think. Either way he got a ticket for at least half price and just worked on a Wednesday where not a lot happens anyway. Wonder how many people do the same

I got into the Arches in Glasgow by handing over a bus ticket.

When I was a kid I went to watch Raiders of the Lost Ark at the cinema but it had sold out, so we bought a ticket to another film, then sneaked into RotLA and sat in the aisle. Got caught and thrown out within 30 seconds. Worst blag ever.


An ex of mine had forgotten/lost her oyster card and was tailing me through the gates. There was a particularly vigilant man on the gate near Earl’s Court and she got spooked and then didn’t follow me through. Tried repeatedly to tap a Boots advantage card against the reader to blag it, until said man came over, examined the card, and bluntly said “this is a boots card, madam”. It was very hard to not burst out laughing. I never did find out what she said to blag her way out of that one.


waves arms to point to my entire life


was in economy on flight home from honeymoon. blagged this:

double booth!

A immediately reclined and slept. i can’t sleep on flights and the guy came over and said hey do you want one of our many lovely wines

and i looked a bit awkward and said oh man i don’t think i can afford anything this serious

and he went no sir, it’s first class, it’s free

so i got wrecked <3


Just walked into a box at headingley cricket ground helped myself to lunch and a few beers, got chatting to a couple of people and watched the whole days play in there.

If you don’t mind getting thrown out you can basically walk in anywhere you want and sometimes you won’t get thrown out.

Jibbing into football grounds is an art form.


I’m a firm believer in the ‘look confident/plausible enough and in most cases you’ll just get waved through’ approach. For years I had a very minor blag going with a shortcut in Canterbury. There’s a part of the city that is the Cathedral grounds that you’re only allowed through if you can prove you’re a resident. A very bored chap sits in a little booth in the gate in the wall and checks you through. For ages I would confidently stroll pass and casually hold up my ‘member of the Association of Teachers and Lectures Union’ card and this chap would let me through.

Anyway one day there was a different bloke in the booth! I strolled past, flashed my card and he said “Can I actually have a look at that please sir?” I showed it to him and he pointed out, in no uncertain terms, that being a teacher did not mean I could stroll through the Cathedral grounds and I had to go the long way round with everyone else. Was pretty mortifying.

Never been back that way since.


Was in Tesco and the person on the till couldn’t get the box of kleenex to scan its barcode, so I said “Does that mean it’s for free?” and the person cracked up, could not stop laughing, and went “oh go on then, we’re not supposed to but that was fucking hilarious” and then everyone else in the entire supermarket burst into applause and I high fived a few of them on the way out.


Let’s see if I can blag some likes