Moise Kean (to break lockdown rules)

incredible trolling by PSG
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I honestly don’t think I’ve heard him utter a word during his entire stint in England until now.

He speaks only basic English and is, uh… a straightforward sort of person.

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Find it absolutely bizarre that someone on £1m a month would just sit inside playing Playstation all the time. He did a tour of his flat for City’s inhouse channel and it was really sad. There was a kid’s bedroom unused, his front room was just a massive telly and loads of matchballs, the only sign of human interaction at all was when he said his best mate’s David De Gea and sometimes they have tea together.

Fair play to him. Definitely a strange bloke, but at the same time it’s quite nice. City lucked out with their big players down the years. When you think about it - Silva, Agüero, Kompany, Zabaleta, etc - just got on with it, really bought into the city, never any off-the-pitch mither.

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Do you think it’s luck or design?

I know the owners wanted a Barcelona style setup - would it be ridiculous for that setup to include looking for a particular personality rather than megastars who’ll do some social media hashtag numbers and sell shirts?

top clubs definitely look into personality/do character referencing before signing them. City and Liverpool are two good examples.

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Klopp especially is big on personality as a deciding factor when signing a player. Can’t find the article now, but there was a good one a while back that went into this. Goes out for a dinner with a player before putting pen to paper/gets to know them sort of thing.

Previous gaffer wanted great characters in his squad too

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fucked that one up, didn’t he

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How am I doing boss?

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Slash player

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Ye olde moral questions to one side, there’s virtually nothing which could feasibly happen in football which would make me laugh more than Kenny Keegle being choppered in and handed a huge war chest to try to bring the mid-90s back to Tyneside.

Imagine if he had the last laugh over Ferguson merely by biding his time for twenty years.

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Remember that time Everton paid 40 million for Alex iwobi

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Multiple-title-winning City legend Richard Wright?

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A team of Ricky van Wolfswinkels

P.s do we get to claim Henri Lansbury too as you loaned him to us

Harry Kane

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Who?