Are you a grass?

Who’s that?

Seeing people pointing out shoplifters to supermarket security really boils my piss


you’re in tesco’s browsing the austrian smoked cheese section, and you notice a couple of guys load up a rucksack with wine and beer. what do you do?

  • Inform the staff discreetly (grass)
  • Call the police yourself (grass)
  • Try and stop them (grass)
  • Ignore them
  • Offer them tips regarding the whereabouts of the security cameras

0 voters

Start nicking when everyone is distracted.


Tell them to save some room for pine nuts


in this instance, the guys ignored my advice, and entered into a twenty minute royal rumble with the store staff and security, running around the shop and smashing the windows trying to get out. was hilarious.

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Only grassing allowed is grassing against Tories, racists, the police or armed forces.

Last 2 are probably the first 2 anyway


You are going through the tube barrier and someone walks quickly behind you so they get through on your ticket.

  • Tell staff immediately (grass)
  • Get annoyed about it but don’t do anything
  • “Well, I don’t know their circumstances so, good luck to ‘em”

0 voters


Depends. Gut feeling is subtly grass if it’s an independent shop, but FUCK THE TORIES if it’s a chain, but then people in, say, Tesco are on low incomes and get bonusses based on a variety of things including stock shrinkage, so idk.

Gut feeling is still to err on the side of caution and not get involved, but the last time i did that a guy who’d nicked four massive tubs of baby food basically threatened and assaulted somebody, so it’s a toughie.

I reckon i probably base it on what reduces my chances of getting knocked out more than what my moral view is on shoplifting.


Used to shoplift loads, no-one ever grassed.

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Ever reported a crime to the feds that you’ve not been the victim of

  • Yes
  • No

0 voters

If yes, what

  • Violence
  • Theft
  • Robbery
  • Burglary
  • Anti social behaviour
  • Drugs
  • Racism/hate speech
  • Other

0 voters

officers will be with you shortly.

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someone i went to school with died getting chased out of sainsburys for stealing some booze. just let people steal.

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he tripped and the bottle smashed in his jacket and killed him.

sounds like a right weapon.


The internet persona safebruv did the shoplifting not me

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Dime dropper.