human

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There are so many breeds of uk bat!

Look at this wee pudding -

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Looks like my A-Level Maths teacher

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Amazing.

Was watching Kill Bill 2 last night. genuinely had a teacher at my school with eyebrows like this -

I dream of one day cultivating such magnificent eyebrows. ONE DAY.

Whichever sleeps and eats the most

Would suggest that these two things are mutually exclusive…

This seems most appealing, so long as it wasn’t a house plant. Something nice and simple in some forest undergrowth, that’d be good.

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I wouldn’t mind being a willow tree

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You might get turned into a cricket bat.

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I could live with that, and Creakyknees would dance with me in stormy weather

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if you were a dog / cow you wouldn’t be able to scratch your own head. think about how annoying that would be

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Trying to work out if a dog cow would be a great or an appalling animal.

wouldn’t be able to scratch its head

If it was the back half of a cow and the back half of a dog then this wouldn’t be an issue.

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“we call it the epimer”

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It would be so famous it could afford to pay someone to scratch its head.

Which brings me back to wondering what happened to Catdog’s digested food…

Orang-utans usually look like they’re enjoying themselves.

Or a dolphin, maybe. Those fuckers are up to something and I want to know what.

Gorilla

dolphin is a great shout