Being sick/throwing up/technicolour yawn - grim anecdotes thread

On holiday with my parents and big sister - I’m 13 or 14

last night my sis and I get very drunk with other youngsters - think I consumed Beer, bacardi, maybe malibu (Which i hate)

Next morning we have to get up early for breakfast - plane to catch. I’m feeling like death and trying to hide it from my folks. Feel a wave of nausea and realise I’m going to throw - but I’m in a big hotel dining room and the loos are miles away. I mumble something about going to the loo and make a break for it. As I’m crossing the dining room I can feel the vom coming. I throw my hand over my mouth, but some of it escapes and spurts round the edge of my hand and onto the floor. I’m still passing dining tables, and the people sitting at them must have clocked me vomming

Make it to the loo and empty my stomach.

We head off on a coach to the airport. It;s super hot and word gets to the driver that our plane is delayed - so we stop off at some tourist place. I can do nothing but lie on a bench - and my parents work out that I’m hungover. They went pretty easy on me considering.

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northumbria, but im familiar with the newcastle union. we could just get carling and strongbow for £1, carling’s probably the only lager i don’t like but still ordered it every time

Ended up on the last train from Cheltenham to Bristol, which got diverted to Severn Tunnel Junction for some reason meaning I had to change trains. I can’t remember why I was so drunk but as the train creaked to a halt I knew I was going to vom.

It was one of those tiny trains where the guard has to turn a key to open the door, which he did next to my door. “Your train’s leaving from Platform 2” he said chirpily, which I answered with a curt thank you nod as I’d just been sick in my mouth. There were a lot of people getting off and nowhere to properly finish being sick, so I ended up walking over the bridge to platform 2 with my mouthful of sick and waiting 4 very long minutes for the train to Temple Meads, which mercifully had an empty bathroom.

I got up 4 hours later to get a train to London. When I got there I realised I was wearing shoes from two different pairs.

My mate had a holiday house which we went to with a few friends. We were only 16 or so and his parents were there this weekend too. We spent a load of time getting absolutely destroyed in this shed thing they’d converted, playing music and inventing really horrendous drinking games. After a night of complete carnage I woke up in the morning to this guy’s mum completely ripping him a new one for how drunk we got, how noisy we were, stuff we’d wrecked and the booze we’d stolen from their cupboards. Shameful.

Only then I rolled over and realised I’d hurled in the bed right next to where I’d been sleeping. Panicked as I didn’t want to admit to it and get his mum involved because she was really mad. Still drunk too I think, I realised the only thing to do was hide the evidence. So I stripped the sheet off the bed with my sick still intact, put it in a plastic bag and did the only thing any righteous man would do in that situation…

…threw it in the loft and never told anyone.

Went to a hallowe’en party in a house where we barely knew anyone, and they were all deaf. The two people we did know were really late so I stood around drinking Polish lager. My signing is shit so I just drank heavily while pretending to understand the topic in hand (heh, hand!). It was deadly quiet too and just incredibly awkward. Sunk about 6 of the beers in an hour and a half, then they had party games which involved some vile green cocktail in a fishbowl. I say vile, it was very fruity, but contained every booze. All the booze. Some of the game involved spinning round with your head on a broom and doing wacky things while dizzy. I wobbled outside and chundered right in the middle of their lawn for about 10 minutes, hands on thighs, legs wide apart.

Chundered in the top bunk in an Estonian hostel while someone was sleeping underneath. Luckily none of it got on them because I used a chocolate bar wrapper to keep it local. Was gonna sleep in it until some French girls left in disgust, so stumbled down the ladder and washed the sheets.

Found out recently that my big bad ex stayed in exactly the same room of exactly the same hostel in a top bunk… but sadly not the same bed.

Got absolutely slaughtered at the works Christmas do - red wine, white wine, few beers, couple of whisky shots - and then met the GF and some friends to go to a gig. Carried on drinking steadily and then decided to break out some horrible rough coke I had. After the gig the GFs brother offered to drive us home by which point I was a total mess and while sat in the back of his prized Alfa Romeo I puked all down myself. Unfortunately I was wearing a seatbelt which I then unfastened. The seatbelt retracted back taking a ton of puke with it deep into the workings which I think he had to then get professionally cleaned. We don’t mention it these days…

Salisbury incident (new year’s day this year outside the cathedral in front of numerous families)

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Oh shit, I just snorted very loudly, sorry.

I was once sick into a pint glass after eating a banana. Grim.

My worst episode was due to labyrinthitis so doesn’t really count as it was just constant dry wretching to the point where I called 999 :frowning:

My daughter had a smallish 17th birthday party at her mum’s on Friday night.

One girl got very very drunk on vodka, ended up wedged down the side of a bed insisting it was the toilet - vommed and had a bit of an accident too apparantly. Had to be carried down the stairs to her mum’s car.

Poor kid - she was fine the next day apparently :slight_smile:

Its all a learning curve :smiley:

Honestly gonna pull a tommy Shelby/pesky blinders and ban spirits at my kids’ birthdays, but lay on pints and pints of mild.

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Was sick on Friday at the pub, was alright

This story has given me The Boke.

Threw up off the side a boat circling the Ailsa Craig this weekend. The seals were loving it

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Did you take a boat from Girvan? I’ve been trying to convince my family to do this for ages.

That’s the one. It was a beautiful experience, you definitely should do it on a day when the sea isn’t too choppy

Last time I threw up was on a surf board in India a few weeks back - a combination of sea sickness and jet lag. Bleurgh.

The worst time was when I was about 19, and I went out drinking with my team from work, from 5pm through till about midnight, then tried to get home, failed to find any buses, was sick all down myself and had to phone my parents to pick me up. Not really proud of that :confused:

Not proud of this at all, BUT:

A few years back I was on a night out with my brother and a few of his friends. We were in quite a swanky pub near Mayfair. It was getting towards the end of the night and my brothers fiend - without me knowing - had bought me a shot of Sambucca. I protested that I wouldn’t be able to drink it, but my bro’s friend was having none of it so I got on with it. Before I’d even put the glass back on the bar there was another one lined up. I protested again but it was still no good, so I started to drink this one but made the fatal mistake of drinking it in 2 sips. By the time I started the 2nd sip I could taste the vile Sambucca and I started to feel the horrible burning sensation that you get when you know there’s no way you’ll be able to mentally combat the nausea and are destined to throw up.

I started frantically looking around me to ascertain where the toilets were (because we’d just got into the pub) and saw that they were upstairs. I instantly deduced that it would be quicker to go out of the front door, so started walking towards the front door as quickly and as gracefully as I could. As I was walking towards the door, the bouncer could see that I was in trouble and asked me if I was alright. I didn’t make it to the door in time and raised my hands to my face to be sick into them. As luck would have it, the sick bounced off my hands and straight into the sleeves of my jacket. A little went on the floor but the majority went into my sleeves. This bought me some valuable time.

The whole thing ended with me balking outside onto the pavement, and tipping the sick out of my sleeves at the same time, with the bouncer patting me on the back and my brother and his friends all watching through the window.

After a while my brother came out to check that I was okay, and tried to get me to go back in but I said that I was finished and needed to head home. On the bus home, realising what a state I was in, I tried to stay in as isolated a place as possible during the journey. Some time into the journey I realised that I was standing behind my new housemate that I’d only known for a week or so (I’d just moved into a shared house). She was talking on her phone, and didn’t see me but I could hear her saying that she could smell vomit.

I got so paranoid that I got off the bus and walked the rest of the way.

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