Fair enough, I’m not one to stand in the way of someone having a pop at @ma0sm

I’m both mild and green

YOU deserve a place on a list.

Honestly, I’m busting my balls here trying to do right by @anon5266188’s wishes and all I get is abuse. You can’t amend polls once they’re up, sorry.

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Prosecco is for people from Essex with fake tans.

hands that do laundry can be soft as your face

I shaved especially for this post

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More of an amateursecco man, hey?

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Hairy-lipped Squidpan?

Your hands?

The long awaited second album

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Sounds like adybongo is antisecco.

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A guy went into a French seafood restaurant and asked to see the
dishes of the day. The waiter wheeled over a trolley with a large tank
full of various species, and the man examined the dishes.

“I’ll have the little green squid with the hairy lip, please” said
the man. "An excellent choice, they have a delicate, mild flavour."
replied the waiter and called out “Gervais!”

A little French chef appeared with a large knife, the waiter
instructed the chef to kill the little green squid with the hairy lip.
Gervais was just about to slice at the poor squid when he noticed a tear
running down its face. Gervais is touched, and admitted that he hadn’t
the heart to kill the squid.

“Not to worry” says the waiter, and called out “Hans!!” at which an
enormous German bloke came out of the kitchen. “Sir”, said the waiter,
“This is Hans, the dishwasher. Hans kill that little green squid with
the hairy lip!”

The dishwasher wielded a huge rolling pin and was just about to
bludgeon the little green squid with the hairy lip when it cringed back
and gave a little cry. "I am sorry sir, I just cannot kill the squid"
Hans admitted, his lower lip trembling.

“Well sir,” said the waiter, "it just shows…

That Hans that do dishes, can be soft as Gervais, with mild green,
hairy lip squid!"

How do you do a blank post?

You what?

No and anyone who does is a mug of the highest order.

Got any loyalty to any non-brands?

My life has improved immeasurably since I switched to Sensodyne.

*Sports Direct mug