Breakfast Reviews

Here is a review of a breakfast that I’ve just read. Feel free to post reviews of breakfasts that you’ve read. Other meals too if you like. I’m not fussy.

So I had my breakfast in the cafe in the park on Saturday morning.

I went for the B&G breakfast and swapped my egg of another sausage. £8.95. Quality of the ingredients was good, but I do have some issues…

The plate was way too small for the 4 pieces of toast to go on with everything else, definitely should’ve been on a side plate. Sausages were OK quality but I would’ve liked them whole, rather than sliced in half. The menu said rocket which, for me has no place on a cooked breakfast, but I thought as a garnish, it can be simply moved, however, there was a small rainforest in the middle of my plate taking up the space that I could’ve emptied my ramekin of beans into. Herby tomato was strange, just a plain one would suffice. Also, a severe lack of mushroom, black or white pudding, bubble or hash brown and had I not swapped my egg for another sausage, £9 is too much just to have one with the aforementioned ingredients missing.

Bacon was good.


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@breakfast_t_england : 10/10

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they did well to get a sausage for an egg trade there

agree that rocket has no place here


Frankly what size plate would you need to get four pieces of toast on as well as an actual breakfast?

got your big plate Alan?


I know what cafe this is, don’t I.

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I would be so furious about the toast on the same plate that it would be a 0/10 before I even got around to posting about the fucking rocket. ROCKET???

This person has had some kind of weird breakfast salad. Sounds fucking shit. 0/10.

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snags sliced in half. What a world.

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Toast - £6/10


Wife mushed up avocado with a little bit of hot sauce, put it on a bagel with cheddar cheese and heated it up in the grill

  • Go on!
  • Fuck off

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Oohh yes, should have mentioned it had mushrooms and egg also, all correctly salted

Yeah I reckon so. Found it while I was browsing for information on the bloke who apparently shot himself dead by accident at the end of my road yesterday.

ah, I see :grimacing:

use a sausage as a breakwater

or better cut it in half and make a breakwater and a reserve breakwater.

3 day old reduced Tesco apple turnover and an oatcake with almond butter



On holiday at moment and my review of the breakfast buffet would be 10/10. At least 4 different types of cakes and an amazing (presumably Spanish) speciality bread with chocolate and hazelnuts in.

spanish buffet breakfast should be baskets of cigarettes and vats of cafe con leche.

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