House/office plants in general are rubbish, aren’t they? Least imaginative way ever to try to make a space more “interesting”. Fuck off to a park or a forest or a garden centre if you want to look at green things, you needy pricks.
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My Dad has got really fucking into bonsai lately in an alarming way, it’s got properly out of hand, it’s gone from him having one which was given to him as a gift to there now being somewhere around 40 “saplings” in various places around the house with all sorts of bodge-jobs there to keep them lit and heated and there’s now a big green tent thing in the garden with thermometers fucking everywhere to regulate temperatures. I don’t know how my Mum’s coping with it frankly.
Love it when Dads get a new hobby and can’t think about anything else.
That “Is your Dad a nerd, mate” thread was good wasn’t it, wonder if we can do a Mum equivalent without it descending into juvenilia
YOUR MUM descends into ABANDON REPLY
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Reckon most of our mum’s would go down a treat if they signed up here.
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Far too easy. LIKE EVERYONE’S ABANDON REPLY
Why did you do this?
Where else do you find beauty in this world, friend?
What a dreary bunch some of you lot are.
Got loads of the things. My grandad also used to grow cacti as a small business. Every windowsill in his house was covered in them. When I move I’m gonna buy some seeds and see if I can grow some from seed. They’re not quite as easy to propagate as succulents where you just use a cutting.
I particularly like the fluffy ones. They’re called Old Man of the Andes.
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I love them. I discovered one of them has put a little flower in its hair.
It probably means it’s dying or something.
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we’ve got that one on the right that looks like Shreks ears.
It’s probably dead now.
Nah it means you’re looking after it properly. Some of them grow really loud fuchsia flowers.
Yeah - tip the stupid plants out and you could use them to serve nuts and stuff.
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That’s a Haworthia- really easy to grow. They grow these really pathetic tiny flowers on stems about 50cm long too.
Picture from google:
And Australia.
Terrible name.
AUBERGINE
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Surely most of these are just succulents, which I would have thought we can all agree on liking? It’s those fucking spikes in the cacti that do my head in.
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The main thing that kills them is too much water. Take it out of the pot, wrap the soil in kitchen roll and leave for a few days, then put the plant somewhere sunny indoors and it should be fine. Very hard to kill.
(The plant’s name is also Crassula Gollum, which is a good plant name)