#124

Are you ready and willing for the planet to end now

  • Yes
  • No hang on this is great

0 voters

#125

I used a “…i’ll have to check with the boss” excuse for the first time ever recently. Don’t know why i said it, just invented a longterm partner to get out of buying a settee.

Then realised it was weird and bought the settee despite not really needing or wanting it, and after, on the advice of the woman in the shop, texting my non-existant partner some photos of it.

What the fuck happened? I could have just said i didn’t like it.

31 Likes
#126

baby daddy? I’d use baby daddy

4 Likes
#127

I love this from Frankie Boyle.

“God save us from “woke” assholes. People who voted Lib Dem two elections ago, but have watched some Netflix documentaries and now understand that their sacred mission is to raise our collective consciousness.”

(I am exactly the target there)

3 Likes
#128

I call him the CWBAFT, a Welsh word that roughly translates as partner

11 Likes
#129

I just refer to her by her name because I assume everyone will know who I’m on about. Only really refer to her as my GF on here, as using her first initial would confuse the fuck out of my sentence structure.

#130
  1. Plastic mike
  2. Clive
  3. @froglet ‘s facemask boyfriend
  4. @meowington ‘s golfman
2 Likes
#131

Epimer’s owl woman

7 Likes
#132

Shit forgot

#133

Ooft I think that might actually be worse than trouble and strife, the ol’ ball and chain etc

#134

Is this @aggpass motorway mate?

3 Likes
#135

How Woke do you think you are?

  • So Woke
  • Quite Woke but not super woke
  • A tiny little bit Woke
  • Not very woke at all
  • Unwoke

0 voters

#137

honestly thought the term woke was to do with racial prejudice?

1 Like
#138

Haven’t read the thread cause…dis… but I got my pants totally pulled down a few years ago by someone using ‘partner’. Was on a two hour drive to a hockey match with someone a teammate I barely knew so by the end of it we’d pretty much covered our life stories. Her 10 year old son was in the back of the car and she’d referred to her ex husband by name and ‘he’ a lot, but also referred to her current squeeze only as her ‘partner’. After a while we were talking about why they’d just moved over from New Zealand for her partners work. Innocently I asked ‘what does he do?’ Which seemed a reasonable assumption, but was met with a smirk and ‘actually it’s a SHE and HER name is Louise’. Felt like I’d totally been set up to fall into that trap and was honestly a bit irked as well as embarrassed. So yeah, call them whatever you want but don’t use it cause you want to trip people up.

12 Likes
#139

I thought it meant that you’ve opened your eyes to a lot of stuff

#140

so unwoke I’m practically asleep ahahahaa

#141

I was wondering when we were gonna get to the part where she literally pulled your pants down.

8 Likes
#142

Totally, not literally, meow

#143

I genuinely thought the story was gonna be this woman is an idiot who pulled my pants down in public and she uses the word partner and thats why I don’t like people that use the word partner

4 Likes
#144

Well that would definitely have made for a funnier story, shall I edit it?

1 Like