#43

Anyone who doesn’t give their mum a birthday card should be destroyed.

4 Likes
#44

Yes, hence the irking.

#45

I’m trying!

#47

they love cards
my mam has a rule - if a card doesn’t have 2 pages of verse, nor make my nan cry it’s not good enough

1 Like
#48

I agree, but unfortunately this thread has reminded me that my mum is coming to visit tomorrow and I still haven’t got her a birthday card.

#49

Yeah, jarg ones to fund all their bombing and stuff. The bloke with the branding iron at the start of videos destroys a big pile of them if you watch long enough.

#50

"fuck off nan, nobody likes you.

Rgds,

Penoid"

1 Like
#51

Basically a blank card that says ‘birthday greetings, regards…’. For people uncomfortable expressing emotion or have strained family dynamics.

1 Like
#52

Scored this for my mum yesterday using tactic 2:

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(says ‘to wish you a Happy Birthday’ on the inside - she’s been on holiday, you see)

#53

Ahm in. I’ll give you a fiver for 49% of the equity in your business.

#54

Rejected Kayas lyrics

#57

Can’t even begin to imagine what a honking great cunt Greg is, the Burtons store card prick.

#59

You can tell from the little ad copy captions that these are all dreamed up by tragic arts graduates from Russell Group universities who thought they’d be knocking out restaurant reviews for the Times by now.

I wonder how I can get into the card game?

#62

It’s a fascinating business model. I mean, you could write 200 of these in a day… what do you do the rest of the time? Is it a freelance gig? Do the designers just write them themselves? Does the cleaner chip in? Baffling.

1 Like
#63

Might actually be lower than “kebab photographer” on the shit art grad job ladder.

1 Like
#64

Speaking of humanity, these do seem to be basically ploughing the same shitty furrow as Cards Against Humanity.

#66

Well, here you go:

“I may write anywhere from two to 20 cards a week, it really varies.”

Can you imagine! “Hey HYG, you got that card text yet?” “I’ll have it in a couple of days boss, I’m just really trying to nail the finish.” “Attaboy, HYG”. HYG goes back to Dissing.

SIGN ME UP.

2 Likes
#67

my dad got me this birthday card

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#68

You do like owls and you are quite irritable, so I think this is good.

#69

It’s funny because bowel rhymes with owl