Card writing crowdsourcing thread


50th birthday card, likes bikes. Quite tall.



Bike Wanker


Thank you for saving the planet you lycra hero.

Lots of love (lol)



“Happy Birthday, You Look Like Dave Grohl!” card


I feel my first draft of “On yer bike, you daft old (tall) cunt!” is, if anything, a bit too professional.


Write all of this article in it:


wanted to start making two cards one with just Happy and one with Sad, just black text on a cream coloured card, can be used for all occasions.


Dear friend/relative/co-worker,

Happy birthday

Warmest regards,

Dr. Epimer


“To [Name],
Happy 50th Birthday
from Epimer”

Pretty much the height of detail I would write in a card, maybe add a small doodle which in this case would be a bike.


did this for my friend’s engagement card, just wrote Happy and a drew a picture of a ring on the front. On the inside wrote “good” and signed it. Actually looked really nice and classy next to the other ones he got.


This. I NEVER write any personalise messages in cards. Mainly because it’s hard, but also because it’s just a card, it’ll get put in a pile of other cards and then forgotten.

Harsh, but ultimately fair.


Bit much


Draw a massive spunky cock on it


Tepid regards,


To blah,

You’re normally a domestique – the unsung hero in the peloton of life. Today is your chance to wear the yellow jersey and, as people watch and cheer you, I hope you enjoy it.

See you in Vodka Revs (our Champs-Élysées) later

Love from Dr Eps

Too much?




Relatively warm regards


‘Roast Beef makes cards’ is one of my favourite Achewood stories and if Bamnan was a cat he would be Roast Beef (no shade, Beef is the greatest)


yeah achewood is the best!


Fucked it.

Tried to do a joke about his favourite cake from the canteen but there won’t be enough room for fifty candles on it!!!

I think I need to resign.