Cat poo

There are cats (two, I think) that keep shitting in my garden.

I want to stop them.

Please suggest humane ways before I incur the wrath of the RSPCA.

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White?

get a pet crocodile

Usually kind of beige, and nearly always too soft to be neatly picked up, the cunts.

Can’t be dealing with reptile poo as well.

Move to a climate that cats do not live in. The Moon for example.

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The cats, or the poo?

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I have no idea whether this works tbh.

You can try sprinkling down hot chilli powder, they don’t like it. But obvs it washes away and so needs doing fairly often

Cat Poower

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Beige cats, tortoiseshell turds

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Should buy them a litter tray.

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Don’t think cats like citrus, a couple orange segments might keep them away.

Sounds more like fox poo than cat poo to me

Get a cat - it’ll either be really territorial and chase the others away or reciprocally shit in your cat-owning neighbour’s garden like ours do.

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I wondered this but fox poo has a really distinctive awful smell which I haven’t noticed, plus I’ve never spotted foxes in the garden (used to see them in London all the time) but I see the cats regularly.

Could be a bit of both though.

Take a piss in your garden, get involved in the territory wars.

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I have done that (not for cat reasons), but there’s a lot of ground to cover and I’m not made of piss

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can you move house?