Choose Your Own Adventure: I am an office worker edition

Your chance to get in on the ground floor for 2017’s hottest secret santa gift presented by @Aggpass and @Epimer

You walk into a toilet cubicle that’s been blocked by an excess of toilet paper do you

  • Attempt to break up the blockage with the toilet brush
  • Tell office maintenance about the blocked toilet (potentially incriminating yourself)
  • Go to another cubicle and not mention it

0 voters

Feel free to create your own, obviously

Great adventure. Thanks for playing, everybody!

4 Likes

Obviously just crowdsourcing some potential situations rather than giving these pricks the full product for free

You’ve been in a phone queue to speak to HMRC for the last 45 minutes. They finally answer.

  • To speak to them and try and deal with whatever you’re doing, turn to page 76

  • To immediately hang up upon hearing them answer, then redial and get back in that sweet, sweet hold queue, turn to page 33

You have to do an ‘online course’ in something elementary like ‘cyber security’.
Do you:

  • Take it seriously and watch the videos attentively
  • Jump straight to the test and just wing it based on you actually having used computers previously.
  • Piss around on social media with the videos running the background and assume you can pass the test but enjoy the necessary ‘time off’.

0 voters

Option four: put on my robe and wizard hat.

I’m going to make a cuppa you want anything?

  • Yes please, Tea for me jill
  • Yes please , Coffee for me jill
  • No, Thank You jill

0 voters

Option 3, right?

2 Likes

The phrasing of option two there is incredible. STUPID DUPLICITOUS COMPUTERS!

Of course, he can blame any wrong doing on the paperclip

You’ve made a terrible mistake which will lead to sever data loss and customer complaints. Nobody has noticed … yet.

Do you :-

  • Speak you your manager immediately, you need to confess to your mistake and rectify this as soon as possible. (Turn to Page 35)
  • Say nothing, perhaps it will blow over, perhaps no-one will notice, it can’t be traced to you… can it? (Turn to Page 67)
  • Start trying to cover your tracks and risk exacerbating the problem or possibly create more evidence that you’re the culprit (Turn to Page 102)

0 voters

You’re going to an event on a friday evening, very close to one of your company’s offices in a different city, which you’ll be late to if you don’t leave your office until 5. Do you

  • book a half day off as annual leave
  • work through your lunch break to clock off early
  • arrive late for the event
  • find an incredibly tenuous reason to arrange a meeting with someone based in that office to get work to pay for your travel

0 voters

Rule of thumb mate, if it’s done on the computer tell your boss, amatuer

1 Like

I owe my entire career and professional reputation to not fessing up to my mistakes.

2 Likes

A nice one from the canteen, or from the disease machine in the corner of the office?

Following the intake of alcohol, your computer will

  • Be impaired
  • Work better and with greater confidence
  • Gain RAM

0 voters

Gemma wants to show you something hilarious that her friend sent her on Facebook. Do you:

  • Watch it with her, laughing politely
  • Say “one second, I just need to make a call” and hope that she’s forgotten about it when you get off the phone.

0 voters

I sent you an email, have you had a chance to look at it

  • Yes
  • No
  • Reported it as junk

0 voters