Choose Your Own Adventure: I am an office worker edition


#1

Your chance to get in on the ground floor for 2017’s hottest secret santa gift presented by @Aggpass and @Epimer

You walk into a toilet cubicle that’s been blocked by an excess of toilet paper do you

  • Attempt to break up the blockage with the toilet brush
  • Tell office maintenance about the blocked toilet (potentially incriminating yourself)
  • Go to another cubicle and not mention it

0 voters


#2

Feel free to create your own, obviously


#3

Great adventure. Thanks for playing, everybody!


#4

Obviously just crowdsourcing some potential situations rather than giving these pricks the full product for free


#5

You’ve been in a phone queue to speak to HMRC for the last 45 minutes. They finally answer.

  • To speak to them and try and deal with whatever you’re doing, turn to page 76

  • To immediately hang up upon hearing them answer, then redial and get back in that sweet, sweet hold queue, turn to page 33


#6

You have to do an ‘online course’ in something elementary like ‘cyber security’.
Do you:

  • Take it seriously and watch the videos attentively
  • Jump straight to the test and just wing it based on you actually having used computers previously.
  • Piss around on social media with the videos running the background and assume you can pass the test but enjoy the necessary ‘time off’.

0 voters


#7

Option four: put on my robe and wizard hat.


#8

I’m going to make a cuppa you want anything?

  • Yes please, Tea for me jill
  • Yes please , Coffee for me jill
  • No, Thank You jill

0 voters


#9

Option 3, right?


#10

The phrasing of option two there is incredible. STUPID DUPLICITOUS COMPUTERS!


#11

Of course, he can blame any wrong doing on the paperclip


#12

You’ve made a terrible mistake which will lead to sever data loss and customer complaints. Nobody has noticed … yet.

Do you :-

  • Speak you your manager immediately, you need to confess to your mistake and rectify this as soon as possible. (Turn to Page 35)
  • Say nothing, perhaps it will blow over, perhaps no-one will notice, it can’t be traced to you… can it? (Turn to Page 67)
  • Start trying to cover your tracks and risk exacerbating the problem or possibly create more evidence that you’re the culprit (Turn to Page 102)

0 voters


#13

#14

You’re going to an event on a friday evening, very close to one of your company’s offices in a different city, which you’ll be late to if you don’t leave your office until 5. Do you

  • book a half day off as annual leave
  • work through your lunch break to clock off early
  • arrive late for the event
  • find an incredibly tenuous reason to arrange a meeting with someone based in that office to get work to pay for your travel

0 voters


#15

Rule of thumb mate, if it’s done on the computer tell your boss, amatuer


#16

I owe my entire career and professional reputation to not fessing up to my mistakes.


#17

A nice one from the canteen, or from the disease machine in the corner of the office?


#18

Following the intake of alcohol, your computer will

  • Be impaired
  • Work better and with greater confidence
  • Gain RAM

0 voters


#19

Gemma wants to show you something hilarious that her friend sent her on Facebook. Do you:

  • Watch it with her, laughing politely
  • Say “one second, I just need to make a call” and hope that she’s forgotten about it when you get off the phone.

0 voters


#20

I sent you an email, have you had a chance to look at it

  • Yes
  • No
  • Reported it as junk

0 voters