Come Dian With Me

You’ve got to invite 3 stand-up comedians to dinner. Who are you inviting?

The more I think about it the more I think it would be the worst evening ever.

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Can they be dead?


Yes. Yes.


One of them must have won Celebrity Masterchef, so them and they have to cook. For the other two, either two dead ones, provided they were still in sealed coffins (for smell reasons), or if they have to be alive perhaps a couple of rather undemonstrative mimes?

Louis CK, George Carlin and Sarah Silverman. I wonder if they would get along.

I think they probably would. I think they’d ignore you though.

Anyone ever see that hour long thing with Louis CK, Ricky Gervais, Jerry Seinfeld and… someone else having a chat? Quite enjoyed that. They all seemed quite pally.

Ohh i get it now


Ade Edmondson won CM so I guess it would have to be him, but I’m not sure I could rely on him to shut the fuck up.

So in for a penny I guess, him and Mayall, because that would be quite good. And Katherine Ryan because she seems nice.

I’m fine with them ignoring me, I think they’d have an interesting time.

Chris Rock I think?

Joe Pasquale and two professional Joe Pasquale impersonators.


I think I’d have Stewart Lee, Stephen Wright and Tony Law. Wright would just break the occasional silence with an amazing one-liner, and Lee would hate the whole thing.

Wait, does Miles Jupp count? Might have him instead of Law. He could just laugh at everything.

I don’t want to live in a world that considers Miles Jupp to be a comedian.

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Russell Howard, Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee.

Just for a laugh.

OK another angle. Am I allowed to give them food poisoning? If so then Mitch Benn, that bloke from Count Arthur Strong and that really unfunny Danish woman comedian who seems to be all over the place at the moment.

Bill Hicks, Doug Stanhope, Peter Cook

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Rhys James, and two others. Don’t care who. I’d let him bang my brains out tbh.

Nice way to avoid having to bother to cook.