Could you destroy a piano with your bare hands?

No hammer.
No screwdriver.
No nothin’.

Could you?

  • Yes
  • No

0 voters

Would smearing faeces across the keys count?


I think it’s brave to admit that you could not


It’s not hard to rip the hammers out, destroying the piano. Any panel you break off can be used as a handy improvised weapon.

I like your thinking, but hammers are replaceable and I reckon it’d be really hard to rip one of those panels off.

Just hands? Can I kick it? (Yes you can!)


Would it count if I pushed it off a cliff?

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If I was on the top floor of a building, or its roof, yes, I could.

(eg the Baker House piano drop)

I will allow kicking, if you think it will help.

In many ways, feet are the hands of the legs



Actually I’ve changed my vote

I would defiantly be able to render one completely useless/ valueless

Cheap old pianos (like not fancy Steinways etc) are effectively valueless anyway as you often literally can’t give them away

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Let’s say it’s on the ground floor, you can get it to the top of a building but you can’t use a loft because the lift is too small

Talk me through your process

I could make it cry by playing Debussy real nice on it

(No, I am not physically impressive enough to do that)

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This counts

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I think the back of an upright piano is pretty vulnerable, if I can just hoof my boot through it, I can start dismantling it.

Similarly with a grand, if I can just stand on top of it and get inside, I have enough weight to fuck that Steinway right up.


As long as I’m wearing shoes, I can break it.

I reckon you might be right with this


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