Create Your Own Bond Cast (Danny Boyle's doin' Bond)


#1

Bond is now careering towards the realms of ‘Christ no’ somehow even more than before, with Boyle at the helm.

In light of that, if you were to reboot Bond, how would you go about it? Obviously Idris Elba playing every single character a la Eddie Murphy is the only true answer that the press will accept, but how about

Bond: Hugh Laurie
Moneypenny: In fact Mr Moneypenny, played by Tom Hiddleston
Q: Carol Vorderman, always drunk
M: Monty Don with dogs
Main Villain: Joanna Lumley, orchestrating James Bond’s downfall from an iron lung
Core Henchman: A henched-out Dane Bowers
Heroine: A disinterested Gillian Anderson.
Femme fatale who turns out to be evil: Katherine Ryan

Someone fucking fund me


#2

never seen any Bond films


#3

have you a bit of any?


#4

Danny Dyer as Bond.
Other soap actors for every other character.


#5

ross kemp as miss moneypenny


#6

only trailers


#7

Helen Worth (Gail Platt) as the ‘Bond Girl’


#8

dev is the main bad guy and sunita is being held against her will under the sea


#9

Bond: Scott Baio
Moneypenny: Albin Jenkins
Q: John Cassisi
M: Martin Lev
Villain: Andrew Paul
Henchman: Sheridan Russell
Heroine: Jodie Foster
Femme Fatale: Florrie Dugger


#10

i think only watching bond trailers is close enough to seeing the entire film tbh


#11

:smiley:


#12

outstanding


#13

Hate James Bond, just associate it with the children’s programmes being cancelled on bank holidays. Weird thing is no one really liked them, it’s like people were tricked into liking them at some point, and not only that tricked into thinking they had always liked them


#14

largely agree. pitching bond is tricky

“he’s a spy”
okay i like that
“proper sort of ex-forces hardcase but also espionage dude”
yep this is going in the right direction
“and he has like… he has gadgets. his watch can explode and stuff”
right uh okay this sounds a little
“and his big thing is having sex with women”

“no but they’re international women. and… hmm. he just sort of sleeps with them.”
okay
“a lot of them then die soon after.”
hmm.


#15

Guy who played jaws came to do a signing at a weird little sports memorabilia store, I was tempted to go along and get him to sign my happy gilmore DVD


#16


#17

Bring back Peircey B. as bond, but playing it as the not-Gerry-Adams-but-clearly-Gerry-Adams character he played in surprisingly good Jackie Chan action romp ‘The Foreigner’


#18

Do we not like Bond again? I admit I haven’t seen the last one, but Casino Royale and Skyfall were both pretty good. Daniel Craig is a top two Bond.


#19

skyfall was v good (for a bond). Spectre…don’t watch it, basically. Do not.


#20

fucking love bond tbh

(grandad was in in the john barry orchestra)

Toss up between Bond or 24 as being my mastermind speciality subject tbh. Probably says a lot about me.