Culinary Lies

#1

Anything food related.

The obvious one’s when some relentless tiresome prick says ‘Have a cup of tea, it’ll cool you down’. Nob. You are just a nob.

My favourite’s when people get a bit of eggshell in their eggs and insist using another bit of the eggshell’s the best way to scoop it fucking out. Boring bastards. Hand straight in. Failing that a spoon’s always, always quicker.

Another one’s people saying microwaving food kills its nutrients. Where are they getting this shit from?

Shoot…

#2

That you need to be drinking eight gallons of water a day or whatever the current lie is.

I’m muting the thread now, bye.

#3

I’ve never accepted hot drinks cool you down, surely it is only activating people’s cooling mechanisms by making them too hot in the first place

#4

“Serves four”

#5

How long it takes to caramelise onions:

#6

Make something with love. Not possible.
Make something homemade not in a home. Not possible.

#7

I try to drink 2-3 pints per day. It doesn’t have any impact on on your skin, though, that’s a myth.

Nobody eats five pieces of fruit or veg a day, not even yoga/cordorouy trousers people.

#8

sourdough bread doesn’t taste better than regular bread

#9

what

i’m willing to bite on this

#10

Literally just had 5 grapes

#11

no-one enjoys those beetroot and lettuce smoothies.

#12

The seeds in a chilli aren’t really hot so don’t worry about it.

#13

All that whirlpool/vinegar bollocks for poachies.

#14

I forgot the big one. Home cooking’s cheaper than just buying stuff. Bollocks.

#15

Stirring something halfway through cooking in the microwave

#16

Depends whether you grow your own pine nuts or not

#17

Who buys pine nuts anyway

#18

its one or the other

TOP TIP

#19

Letting a Guinness… settle, just wasting time and it tastes exactly the same

#20

This is a good one

see also - How long it takes to cook risotto - “stir and ladle in stock for 20 minutes” BULLSHIT!!!