Dad Jokes



I still can’t believe you fawned over Mr. Egg doing the same joke as Colossal Horse did two posts above


I’m happy for the cheggster to take this one. I got 6 likes. I’m not greedy.


The differences between the two are what make cheggers’s one so good, no offense meant to the big horse


I’m with you. Pain over hunger takes it up a notch



(After hanging up after a long, deeply involved conversation)

“Who was that?”

“Dunno, wrong number!”.


Basically any ailment - “Dad I’ve hurt my leg/Dad there’s something in my eye”
“Don’t worry son, you’ve got two of them.”

Even to things like
“Dad I have a tummy ache”


I met a lovely Turkish couple on holiday a few years ago.

But I never Erd from them Ogan.


I was once taken hostage in Nepal for three months with Iron Maiden.

The siege in Kathmandu went on and on.


Did you hear about the scarecrow who won the Nobel Prize for chemistry?

He was outstanding in his field.



Why is it the funniest month of the year in France?

Because it’s quite Août



It’s the way you tell them.


“Doctor, doctor, I’ve got a sirloin steak stuck to my cornea”

“Well, there’s more to that than meats the eye”




A steak joke… that’s a rare medium. Well done.


Alright, mate. Don’t overcook it.


With thanks to automatik from the old boards for this one.

Why should you never go to Karl Marx’s for a brew?
Because he thinks all proper tea is theft.