Dad jokes 😐... 🙂... 🙄

futilityofendeavour · 2020-07-18T07:35:21.284Z

ADAM ANT: How many tickets have we sold? TOUR MANAGER: Precisely five. We sold them to Stan, Dan, Oliver, your mummy and your wife...

HotBeefTrauma · 2020-07-18T21:09:55.718Z

Was walking down the road earlier and I saw a lemon cheesecake, an apple pie and an ice cream sundae.

I thought, ‘hmmm the streets are strangely desserted’.

colon_closed_bracket · 2020-07-18T21:25:50.430Z

Bloody hell, that took a while to register

Raanraals · 2020-07-18T22:10:27.602Z

It falls apart a little after Dan.

NoahVale · 2020-07-20T08:17:51.919Z

NoahVale · 2020-07-20T11:43:39.985Z

Bought a dog off a blacksmith.
Ten minutes after we got him home he made a bolt for the front door.

hip_young_gunslinger · 2020-07-21T13:29:40.271Z

This has properly got me, fuck’s sake

NoahVale · 2020-07-21T13:39:45.434Z

I know. Was on my FB, © SiBadvibes

maggieloveshopey · 2020-07-21T15:09:20.883Z

I wonder what tree they were in? Different birds have different favourites but most will agree that nothing compares to yew.

futilityofendeavour · 2020-07-22T11:46:41.162Z

#darkdadjokes

chanticleer · 2020-07-22T12:45:24.755Z

At least he probably had a lovely finish

futilityofendeavour · 2020-07-22T12:46:19.138Z

Indeed, a good day to gloss over bad news

the_ravens · 2020-07-22T13:17:23.365Z

Why is everyone walking on eggshell about this?

the_ravens · 2020-07-22T13:17:53.280Z

Sorry, I’m a bit emulsional

Scagden · 2020-07-22T13:37:55.854Z

You’d have to use gloss because Matt was taken

Scott_Chegg · 2020-07-23T10:26:58.903Z

But worrying how many doctors and dentists are still only practicing

futilityofendeavour · 2020-07-25T18:55:52.004Z

What did Jive Bunny die of? Megamixamatosis #totp

7:49 PM - 24 Jul 2020 820 190

NoahVale · 2020-07-27T12:00:25.896Z

I wore one on my face the other night but it didn’t work. No skin off my nose.

sadpunk · 2020-07-30T15:33:24.491Z

Someone just messaged me to ask if I knew of any good campsites nearby and I told them to head for HIYAAAA ground.

anon32406580 · 2020-07-30T15:41:50.835Z

OMG where is this from? This would be Xmas present for one of my friends sorted instantly.