DADSNET - new forum/newborn (doesn't even rhyme)


I’m very sceptical about stuff like this, but took a chance on one after 3 weeks of 4:45am wake ups. Game changer.


We’ve got one of those - essential I would say.

Until your daughter’s six year old cousin teaches her how to override the parental lock controls :rage:


In a flat you probably won’t even need one at all to be honest. Our flat is quite spread out but we can always hear him crying from the other end of the flat. Still use a monitor though - just for a bit of peace of mind in case we’re listening to music or something. As for functions I would agree that you don’t need much, but my wife found the temperature monitor reassuring as that just happens to match one of her key paranoias.


Any dads taken longer parental leave than the standard 12 weeks? We haven’t got another on the way yet but been talking a bit about how we’ll manage it next time - wife taking 6-8 months off, both of us taking 4-6 months off, or maybe even just me taking 6-8 months off.

I (think I) know that legally I’d be entitled to statutory parental pay from the govt, and that my employer would have to keep my job for me. But I think it’s entirely up to them if I get anything else right? Or do they have to give me the same conditions they would a female employee?


yep definitely a good purchase.


Standard 12 weeks? You mean 2 weeks?


yes indeed I do.


Ha for a second I thought I’d been royally screwed!


I had a complex situation (explained in painful detail above), but I think if you’ve been with a company long enough you’re allowed to split leave with your partner, right? And your company is obliged to honour it? Not looked into properly as it wasn’t relevant to me, but sounds good. I literally offered to quit my job to be a stay at home dad but it didn’t fly.


In ref to your bit above btw, I had a related beeve with my employer who I’d only worked for for 2 months when our bub was born so def not entitled to anything, but I remember the head honcho coming and congratulating me and saying “it’s a shame you’re not entitled to paternity leave I’m sure that must be tough” as if it was completely out of his hands just because the government wasn’t literally forcing him to pay me a couple of weeks wages. had to take unpaid leave


The employer doesn’t have to pay the same as they would for someone on maternity pay, but you’re right that after the first two weeks the remaining 37 weeks statutory pay (and 50 weeks leave) can be split between the parents how you like (provided you’ve been in the job long enough to be eligible, etc).


It’s not even full fucking pay! Fuck these capitalist pigs.


I took six weeks off when our first was born and ten weeks off for the second. Really helped to have two parents at home in terms of establishing a routine and getting past the first few weeks of craziness and no sleep.

That said, I am self-employed so have a very understanding boss (he’s also very intelligent, funny and a considerate lover)…


*also these not-for-profit, operating just above insolvency BASTARDS


I took 5, but am also self employed so didn’t get paid. I thought I was timing the end of a contract perfectly to coincide with due date, but my son was really overdue and I ended up spending two weeks sitting in my house watching films and sleeping.

Post having a child, that sounds like utter bliss but I feel like I squandered it.


Cheers for the monitor feedback.

Leave, etc - I took the two weeks paternity support, plus two weeks annual leave from the due date, and that was following on from a week off over Christmas leading up to the due date. MiniWza was two weeks overdue, though so we had two weeks together after the birth. Was nice to be off for the in-limbo waiting-for-the-drop fortnight.

MsWza had annual leave built up and finished up five weeks before the due date and she’ll probably take a full year off. We thought about splitting maternity/paternity with, say, 9 months maternity then 3 months paternity. But, instead, I intend to go down from a 35 hr 5 day week to 32 hrs over 4 days from when MiniWza is 9 months. That will allow MsWza to do a day a week keep in touch until she goes back to work for her 3 day week and we’ll only need 2 days nursery per week from then on.


Yeah I’m going down to 4 days a week from 1st April. Only one more Monday left!! Then it’s just putting my feet up and watching tele all day every Monday :+1::+1::+1::+1:


Would love to go to a four day week. The last two weeks I did four day weeks (one sickie, one holiday day), and it’s so nice being at home with them and just helping out.


Planning on booking Wednesday’s off in April and May under the ‘pretence’ of triathlon training (which is actually true, so not even a pretence’, really) as a stealth proof-of-principle before submitting the four day proposal.

Should be in the bag. The council are always looking to save money, so the fewer hours should suit. And they’ve not a leg to stand on in terms of how it might affect my team, considering the departmental restructuring nonsense and resource withdrawal they’ve indulged in over the past 12 months.


One of my favourite things is to book a day off work, do nursery drop off, then have a day to myself. Last time I did it I crammed so much in. It was amazing.

Did drop off, dropped off jeans to get mended, went to the gym, tube into town with a podcast, cinema, couple of shops in west end, lunch at Spuntino, haircut, tube home, quick pint, pick up.