^This bit is largely true. The only counterbalance is that having two is literally three times as much work as having one
Yeah, we were out with people who had two earlier and they were literally running in opposite directions. So basically, it’s fine up until the point they can walk
Was going to PM UP but figured it might be more beneficial to fellow Dadsnetters to post in the main thread.
Had a nightmare start to pre-school with Offspring II. His potty training had never been great - he was basically fine so long as you reminded him every 30 minutes or so to try, but was showing no signs of taking the initiative himself. As such, it was with some trepidation that we started his first full days at pre-school. Unsurprisingly, the combo of excitement at virtually unlimited play options, unrestricted access to drinks, unfamiliarity with the surroundings plus general tiredness meant that he was having at least one accident every day. After a few weeks the pre-school called us in and suggested that maybe he wasn’t ready and could we take him out until after half term. Which was the beginning of November. And we were at the end of September. And both me and the TV have jobs (me five days a week, her four days a week) and no other childcare options. Was obviously slightly concerning, but we managed to agree that he could do half days as he was only really having accidents in the afternoon. Managed to cover the afternoons with a childminder for a couple of days and me at the TV taking half a day’s leave each every week. Absolutely nailed the potty training the next weekend and used loads of the techniques suggested in the book recommended by @UnicornPorn and @rob.orch up ^there. Fortunately he started to get it, and went from an accident every day to probably one a week at school and one per week at home. Started back full time after half term and has probably had two accidents since then, which to be fair to his pre-school they have been pretty chill about. He hasn’t had an accident for about three weeks now so fingers crossed for no regression, but it looks like he’s finally nailed it. Stressful few weeks, and way harder than with his big sister who basically got it over the course of two days - just goes to show that you do the same parenting, but some stuff is just hardwired into them.
Thanks for all the tips, and especially @UnicornPorn for the book. If anyone wants it passing on, then give me a shout (bonus - it has UP’s Which? account details written in it ).
Having our worst couple of days since Luna was born. Starting weaning a couple of weeks ago and she is SUPER CONSTIPATED. She did a more solid poop than I’ve had in about ten years earlier, poor kid.
We bought a bag of dried prunes for when The Child gets like this.
I think I used to blitz some prunes (canned I think? Blitzed because too lazy to chop finely) and add a bit to R’s breakfast cereal and that helped.
Emma’s Kitchen pouches also have a prune one too. You can mix it into loads of things. I made jam tarts once and mixed it with the jam and it was surprisingly really nice!
Ella not Emma obvs
We’ve been feeding her prune purée, it’s no kind of life.
Take her to the gp if you haven’t. They might put her on lactulose or similar to keep her regular. You don’t want an association between trying to go and pain as well. That’s what our one was on for a bit. Sorted him out
Aww that’s so good to hear.
Ours has starting shatting where he likes like an incontinent cat in the last few weeks (despite being perfectly potty trained for about 8 months). It’s defo behavioural, as I suspect a bit of nursery and family stress recently has made him play up. I’m now off for two weeks so going to lovebomb him and get back on track (he’s good at home, but feral at nursery. wee soul is going through something, obviously).
Kind of stalled on potty training as I am too scared/weak to do it properly. Have R going to the potty most nights before bed which is great as now he rarely leaks in the night, but haven’t really gone further than that. He has quite often been waking up dry in the mornings and I ask if he wants to use the potty but I haven’t been able to get him to go and I am too tired to get him to at that stage of the day.
Feel like I am letting him down by not encouraging him more to learn to use it all the time.
Same here. Not started as I’m too lazy/weak and am really stressed about the next several years of “do you need a wee before we go?” And dashing for toilets when we’re out (I mean I’ve needed to pee foe the last 3 hours and I can’t even be bothered to take myself to the toilet).
Also I’ve been reading Oh Crap so slowly I’ve forgotten most of it. Planning to start on boxing day as got a week off so can be hermits, but really anxious about all that other being-organised-and-taking-spare-trousers-out stuff.
Night time ‘training’ is totally different- the ability to hold the bladder / bowels and wake to pee/ poo is determined by a hormonal change that happens when it happens, so no amount of coaching will help. Day time training is very much coachable- lots of books say the earlier the better and others say later. You do it when you can face it as a parent imo!
Another vote for Davidoff Cool Ella’s Kitchen Prunes. Straight out of the pouch, on a spoon, or stirred into porridge.
if you religiously follow the Oh crap method like we did (ie bare naked (she’ll love that!) and stalk her completely for the first two days) you will crack it. I remember that first week where we ventured out on day 3 and took the potty everywhere (inc to a shoe fitting at clarks where they had the excellent grace not to notice/care that I had a paw patrol potty under my arm) but it was never needed and there were no accidents. We did go into every coffee shop in town one day when he said PEEPEE every two mins on a walk through town, but got stage fright at every loo, and I was tearing my hair out. but that was our only massive stressy frustration that I can recall by specific example. I do however remember that first few weeks feeling- generally- like I was on a knife edge, and once I eventually relaxed I forgot that he was in pants, until he would ask to go. We did a big car journey yesterday where he refused to pee before we set off, and I was worried- but he did it! They surprise you. (and then they shit under a table because you say no to haribo)
btw we only used the potty to catch pee that was already flowing in the first few days (as per the book), and then moved straight to insert on toilet seat, which we found worked much better. He wouldn’t pee in a potty now even if I bribed him with haribo. I don’t know what’s better- but at least I don’t have to carry the potty around I guess.
In my experience there isn’t really a method to follow with toilet training. You’ll get a feeling and then also realise it’s worth clearing your diary a bit for it. It’s not a long process and while there are sometimes some regressions and frustrating periods, in the end the kids are normally ready, and pre-school is (rightly or wrongly) developed around toilet training. The only tip I’d give is don’t be confusing, if you’re going to commit then just go for it when they’re ready and keep the nappies off except at night
Thanks. I think I’m just put off by seeing our neighbours kids who have been potty training since the start of summer and still have to chase her around with a potty when we’re put. They used that book too and said she got it really quickly but I guess what I think of as getting it is a k of taking themselves to the toilet won’t no intervention or accidents and basically just being adults about it. Which is ridiculous but I guess I’m just scared of the effort on my part.
Well, we’ll find out come 26th.
PS. I will definitely come up to Glasgow next year if you think we can find a babysitter who’d have them both so we can go out for a few drinks, or put me in touch with one. Really want to see you guys.
If shes still chasing with a potty then she’s not following the book, as it says to stop after a certain amount of time if they’re not spontaneously taking themselves to the loo. She needs to stop and reset.
We would love to have you to stay! I am sure I can sort a sitter if C doesn’t fancy the task of double trouble childcare