This seems to be becoming a bit of a thing. I’m more aware of it than most because my no-sex-before-marriage friend claims to be demisexual (I’m suspicious given that she’s told me stuff in the past that doesn’t really work with being demisexual, especially as she now goes on about how she’s only ever been sexually attracted to her current boyfriend when in the past she very definitely implied feeling it for her ex who was going to propose to her before getting cold feet about her and Christianity in general).
Recently they had a big emotional convo about him spending time one on one with attractive women outside of a work context - he refused to in case it triggered her being jealous or paranoid because he’s an allosexual (capable of being sexually attracted to people he doesn’t know) and is therefore more likely in theory to stray from her than vice versa. It all seemed ridiculous to me on a subjective level (they are devout Christians and are utterly devoted to each other, can’t even imagine why he would think this might be an issue) but also from an objective one. You don’t have to be demisexual to be paranoid???
I’ve also been aware of debates on it since accidentally once joining a group of radical aces (asexual people) and they were constantly bashing the concept of demisexuality because to them, asexuality could not be a spectrum - you either were or were not capable of sexual attraction.
I guess while I can see how it would be annoying for someone ‘demi’ wanting to participate in the modern dating game, I wonder if it’s especially useful to micro-categorise sexuality? Everything is on a spectrum to some extent - is an identity needed for the varying degrees and quirks of how capable of being attracted to people you are?
Also aware that I’m probably just sceptical because it’s a new idea and I struggle with those sometimes. Sorry if this is overly unsympathetic to the idea. I’m open to learning more about it.