Spoilers ffs
maybe thats waht i saw, who can say
Very vulnerable
But with a heart of gold!
1 Like
Episode 5
- theyāre selling Kevās autographs to fund the home. how is this place still afloat? last week it was a jumble sale. Kev doesnāt work or live there either
- Tom Basdenās running the autograph shop
- Derek canāt remember who did any of the autographs apart from Kerry Katona who was sick on it when she did it
- Kev has autographs from Uncle Ben and Mr Sheen apparently. He looks at the camera a lot
- Derekās got Kev in a headlock on the floor
- Derekās now got Karl Pilkington on the floor. apparently Derekās obsessed with wrestling people to the floor. Kindness is magic
- Karlās going red cause he canāt breath and Derek keeps pressing his head so he goes white
- Derek doesnāt like real fighting because it hurts them so he wrestles people he does like. Strong cuddling. He gurns
- cuts to Derek on top of Karl on the floor asleep on him. how long did that go on for
- The Day Trip!
- all the old people are going but not Kerry Godliman even though sheās apparently the only person who works there
- wonder what happened to the community service girl who ended up loving it
- sad music plays cause some old people canāt go
- Derek asks if a motorway or a train track would win in a race
- Derek asks what would win out of AIDS or rabies
- Derek asks if you can give AIDS cancer
- Karls complaining to the camera about how much Derek talks. second time in five episodes that exact set up has happened
- thereās a new old woman. wonder if Kerry Godliman will end up trying to get with one of her relatives too
- oh no the relative knows her from school and instantly shames her for not staying on at school to do A Levels and whether you need qualifications to work in a care home
- Kev tells a racist Chinese joke then gets off the bus for a piss and goes to piss on the bus
- Derek spots a cyst on Kevās cock. he gurns at the camera and then says heās seen the worstest penis in the whole world
- Kerry Godliman feels sorry for her self that this relative earns more money, she quotes something apparently an old woman said to her which she definitely didnāt and then Kerry Godliman starts talking about how nice Derek is for absolutely no reason
- Sad music as Karl Pilkington talks about how nice Kerry Godliman is as it cuts to her sat in a chair looking glum
- holy shit its actually Coldplay and theyre doing the āmatch lyrics to what you see on screen again
- cuts to Kerry Godliman scrubbing a urinal on her knees and crying
- shows a scene of her sleeping next to the old woman from the last episode as the lyric āshe closes her eyes playsā
- the Paradise chorus plays over the shittest looking beach ever and Derek and Kev and Karl on the rides
- Kerry Godliman cleans to Coldplay
- all the old people have gone missing as Karl and Derek are on the beach together
- oh no one old bloke in a wheelchair in a jumper on the beach plays swingball with Karl.
- apparently the old bloke is called āSaloā
- community service girl does exist and is back
- she threatens to stick rude daughters head down the toilet
- Steal My Sunshine plays as Kev in tighty whities and Karl chuck seaweed at each other
- rude daughters talking about how people are sexually attracted to her but are put off by how smart she is
- Kevās writing on crabs
- heās written Twat, Quim, Tampon on them
- dunno where the old people have gone again
- Derek gurns
- Derek picks up a crab and gurns at it. multiple close ups of the crab and then Derekās face
- rude daughter and new old woman have a completely unprompted disagreement about who is more disappointing to each other because new old woman said to get some fish and chips
- first use of cunt I think
3 Likes
Unbelievable
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