❤❤❤ DiS Blind Date ❤❤❤ EPISODE SIX

Welcome back you beautiful bunch of romance-junkies.
Part two of today’s double-bill is here!

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WHO’S FUCKING PUMPED UP FOR THIS ONE?

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Super PUMP

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@discobot quote

:left_speech_bubble: The Creator has not given you a longing to do that which you have no ability to do. — Orison Marden

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HA! YOU’RE A RIGHT CARD DISCOBOT!

Thanks

Without further ado let’s meet tonight’s contestant. Please introduce yourself…
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It’s only bloody @Slicky!!!

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Hey up dating fans. My name’s Slicky, I’m from the countryside and I am pretty flipping old. Can’t wait for my date…better feature historic views and cheese please funksty.

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Ok Slicky, three potential suitors have answered your questions in a bid to win a date. Here is the first question

I am a green fingered goddess with fingers in many pots. Imagine I asked you to sculpt my hedges topiary style what would you produce and why?

SUITOR 1:

Well Cilla, I would evoke the passion and romance of the city of luurrrve everytime we looked out of the window with a faithful recreation of the Parisian skyline- complete with the tower of Eiffel, the Arch of Triumph, the tower of Eiffel and a (possibly singed) Notre-Dame.
A towering erection, a triumphant arch(ing of the back) and a GODDAMN RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE

SUITOR 2:

Topiary? We talking about bushes here? Like the mid-90’s grunge-lite band Bush? Can we have more breadsticks over here please?

SUITOR 3:

To honour the Goddess that you are whilst also acknowledging my own horticultural limitations, I would sculpt your hedges in the style of the Parthenon.

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Who gets the point?

Hmmm with these intriguing answers I’m going to need a moment.

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In this quiet moment let’s do a prize draw. @imaperv please pick a number 1-10.

Ok. Suitor 1 I admire your ambition and your dedication to creating a romantic outlook. Unfortunately Paris is home to the toilets at the Gate du Nord so it’s a no from me

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Suitor 2. Bush leads me to consider Gwen Stefani, the best hollaback girl of the 90s. Unfortunately their partnership has now ended so that leaves a sour taste. Sorry

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Suitor 3. This is the absolute right approach to my hedges. Goddess indeed and you already acknowledge your failures. The point is yours.

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SUITOR 3 takes the first point!

Living in the countryside I have an accent between a cider farmer and a moon fishing yokel. What’s the best accent you can adopt and what’s your best line?

SUITOR 1:

I like to do Yorkshire, however appallingly. I have been known to sing famous Disney classics in this voice. “And now tha’ ahm growwn ah eat five doz’n eggs soo ahm roughly t’size of a baaarrrrggge” That, or Bane voice.

SUITOR 2:

I think my favourite accent is the acute, because it’s just like you.

SUITOR 3:

https://vocaroo.com/i/s1FDQwHZAdsF

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Enjoying the consideration Slickster is giving to the answers.

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It’s above and beyond tbh. We have the prosecco to thank.

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