Users are asked to respect the peace and quiet by refraining from loud conversations, using mobile phones or playing loud music.
Can I knit in here?
I can fuck you up with these needles you know
You may knit one, but you MAY NOT purl one.
Is it like ones on the trains?
full of cunts
Excuse me, this is the quiet carriage
I think someone’s sat in my reserved seat?
What’s the protocol here?
Best tune to play over train tannoy while guard is distracted?
No, I think you’ll find it’s my seat.
Let me see your ticket there…
Pockets your ticket and sits back down
Guys, can you keep it down, I am trying to have a doze, ta.
Has a coughing fit
Sorry guys, I need to take this
Opens a big bag of crisps
glares and points at quiet coach sign
shakes head in mutual exasperated disapproval