#142

it’s really awful, I think about my interactions with women and just thinking that I’m a decent person so obviously I mean well isn’t good enough.

There does seem to be this dodgy perception that music belongs to men and women are just playing at it and don’t really understand it on a deep level.

Ah just the whole thing is terrible, I’m sorry!

1 Like
#143

I’m sorry you got flashed, and no-one said anything.

Why can’t we just be allowed to go to things and have a nice time, without someone deliberately spoiling it, and trying to humiliate us?

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#144

it’s like your living on a hostile alien planet :frowning:

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#145

nah it’s worse than that.

sorry I will leave your thread now.

#146

Thats why Trump being elected is so scary, because a major world leader is advocating and partaking in this behaviour, and a large number of people either support his actions or are prepared to ignore it.

#147

I don’t blame anyone for giving up on life.

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#148

A guy at work assumed I was a poor student and offered me some leftover rolls from a work party to take home…cause I’m poor. I’m fairly certain I get paid roughly the same as him which definitely is not poor.

I laughed in his face and was thinking “mate if only you knew how much I spend on toast”

7 Likes
#149

That I’m moody, arrogant and rude. And they’re not fucking wrong!!11

#150

I remember I went to see Le Tigre in 2001, when I was about to turn 17. One (straight) male friend in our group said afterwards that he had felt really uncomfortable and unwelcome at the gig, like he wasn’t supposed to be there and it wasn’t for him. He was quite surprised when I and another female friend said that’s how we felt nearly all the time at gigs. It had never happened to him before at the age of 19. It really didn’t help that I was going to see a load of post-rock and post-hardcore bands at the time, and the whole thing was just a total sausage-fest. It was rare for me to see a woman on the stage, and that was in big acts like Sonic Youth. I can’t even think of any I saw at a local gig. Not one.

Also I remember how nice it felt when I went to see Toro Y Moi, and the crowd looked like the mix of people you’d see on the street outside in London, the same mix and proportions of genders, races etc. You get way too resigned to just seeing this sea of white men, and I think it always puts you slightly on edge. Like you might be “allowed” to be there right now, but actually you’re kind of on the edge.

#151

you’re welcome at my fictional gigs that I will never play!

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#152

I am less shy than I was at 16 thank god.

#153

so is it inferred from your posting that you make music as well? Must be tough.

#154

Not for other people’s ears.

#155

that’s fine, no problem.

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#157

I assume so

#159

Goes both ways!

#160

im not a veggie

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#161

No idea what the assumptions are - there must be some tho

:thinking:

#162

Pre beard and when I sported a center parted Brian Molko circa 1996 Bob, got mistaken for a women a fair bit, even after people heard me speak. Happened a lot at school too because my name ends in an A, a few months ago I lost my driving licence card and someone posted it back addressed to Ms. Also get the age thing a lot, think the secret is a complete lack of facial expression, can’t get wrinkled if I never move my face. Going a bit grey now and have an old worn down look

#163

This kind of thing is depressing as fuck. I hate that it can be such a hostile atmosphere for girls at gigs. Gigs should be for everyone, and I think about the amount of talented musicians who are put off engaging with music because of bad treatment by dickhead blokes putting them off the scene entirely.

When I see stuff happen at gigs/clubs I do try and get involved either by shouting up or getting a bouncer (sometimes that’s pointless though!), but I’m always wary of coming across like a “white knight” dickhead who thinks they’re being some sort of hero.

Last time it happened was at a Sleaford Mods gig and I grabbed him after he touched this girl, and she hurried off into the crowd. He denied it (was a massive prick) and I then doubted myself whether he had done it or not. But he had, and I wish that there was a better way of stamping this shit out of all corners of our society!