Do you ever feel like just the least capable person ever?

I create ATP like the badass motherfucker that I am. Fuckin’ respiratory chains 4 lyfe.

alright Barry Hogan

You’re good at your job!
And you are lovely and excellent, joyful company :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

And I’m absolutely not ‘just being kind’ I’m saying this because it’s true and you deserve to feel better about yourself and I like you lots x

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Everyone.

The entire world, every single person doing every single job ever, all of them. It’s getting done the night before or the morning of. Competence is a myth; it’s just the ability to improvise well enough that you don’t get found out.

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You’re probably right, I guess I’ve met a couple of people who have convinced me of their capabilities by having done or are continually doing amazing things - though having said that, the ones I’m close to are still full of self-doubt despite massive success

Nah, this is the best thing about getting older.

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This is kinda comforting though right? The older I get, the more suspicious I get of anyone who holds a definitive opinion on more than one topic.

You’re allowed one area of relative expertise each which which is probably related to your job, study or main hobby - anything beyond that, you’re just winging it. The world’s too complex and nuanced, and life’s just too busy to speak with authority on a bunch of different things.

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Yeah, I guess

Specialist subjects are an interesting thing. I mean, some areas of knowledge have a more or less finite limit. I’d say that I know pretty much all there is to know about practical analogue subtractive synthesis for instance - give me a synth & I can program the sounds you want. But then there’s the first mathematical principles (that I know a tiny bit of) principles of electricity, signal flow, theoretical electronics & practical electronics + all the history of these ideas, their convergence in technology, the history of that technology in the marketplace and the history of the art - the genres & sub genres - that have been made with this technology and how they interface with other art (eg performance art) and technology (eg music video)

So yeah, we’re all just working with this knowledge map that’s an (semi-random) accumulation of associations over time that if we’re able to ring fence a tiny part of we might be able to convince ourselves & others of our expertise and great knowledge

And that’s just the 2D version - there’s also the whole 3rd dimension of being capable of motivating ourselves, navigating the landscape of others in our interest area, being able to sustain our level of interest & knowledge in our given area etc etc in order to not just be knowledgeable but to be functional & capable enough of maintaining our knowledge & capabilities - and staying engaged & interested

Not sure what my point is but I generally always come back to Vonnegut’s “We’re here on this earth to fart around and nothing more. Don’t let anybody tell you any different”

We’re all amazing & incredibly complex ignorami with no purpose really - skin bags full of meat with a desire both to do everything and nothing at the same time.

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