Do you feel a need to match or surpass your parents'/guardians' achievements?


#1

My parents have no educational qualifications whatsoever so no stress for me.

I don’t measure myself against anyone really which has been good and bad I think.

(Let’s keep showing off to a minimum please, this is more about the ideas than a pissing contest).


#2

pretty much same as you saps


#3

My parents managed to conceive me which is a greater achievement than I or anyone else could hope to match


#4

No, my parents both went to college via night school so I’ve surpassed their academic achievements. I do feel a huge responsibility to have a ‘proper career’ though given how much they’ve supported me and while they’re alive I don’t see me doing anything other than a normal 9-5 job.


#5

It’s complicated.

My dad was professionally successful in his field, and now he’s retired from that he’s successfully founded two businesses with my brother. I long ago realised I was never going to be successful in the same sense that he was - which was particularly apparent when I initially began my “career” in the same industry as he’d been in.

But neither of my parents went to university so when I got a place at a good university I was quite proud of myself and happy with how proud they seemed to be of me. I guess it’s all been downhill since then.

I think the key thing is it’s not about trying to live up to their achievements, it’s trying to live up to my parents desires for me to be happy.


#6

Nope. We’re different people of different generations who want different things out of life. Why would I compare my achievements to them in that case?


#7

I only really measure myself against an unrealistic expectation of where I think I should be, which isn’t ideal.

I think my sister felt a bit of a need to try and exceed what I’d done, which I think she’s succeeded so fair play to her.


#8

Not educationally but it does leave me frustrated with myself that when it comes to anything DIY based more than hanging a picture I get my Dad round to help me which is basically code for “I have no real idea how to approach this so come over and do it for me whilst I make cups of tea and pass you various tools”.


#9

I’m just trying to dress cooler than my old man did back in the 70s, I’m failing so far but I still got some time.


#10
  • Yes
  • No
  • Maybe

0 voters


#11
  • I don’t know
  • Can you repeat the question?

0 voters


#12
  • You’re not the boss of me
  • You’re not so big
  • All of the above

0 voters


#13

Nah, but my mum reckons that the reason that my dad hasn’t bothered to try to have a relationship with me is that he’s jealous of my achievements. Which is nice.


#14

Yeah but I think it’s a thing with children of immigrants, your parents go through so much to make sure you have more opportunities than they did so there’s pressure on you to succeed academically and professionally so their hard work wasn’t in vain


#15

It’s probably because I’m a dick, tbf.


#16

Yeah, kind of this - both parents are from large working class families and did a hell of a job getting where they are, there is always a persistent nagging in my head of wanting to make sure their efforts and energy wasn’t in vain. I think a side effect of it though, is that I am far too stubborn to want to accept much help, even though as Kallgeese says earlier, we’re different generations and the goalposts have moved a bit


#17
  • Life is unfair
  • Enter at least 2 options

0 voters


#18

My grandad was involved in an elaborate scam with his brother, and then shopped him in when they realised they were about to be caught.

So… yes.


#19

I’m an artist so no :wink:


#20

(I’m not really an artist just a guy who spends all day in his dressing gown drinking tea)