Do you think the amount of sex you will have in your life will overtake the amount of wanks?


I would say no. I think I built up a pretty unsurmountable lead from the ages 13-18.


Almost certainly not.


Absolute no chance


Not sure it’ll ever start closing the gap tbh




It would probably look good on a line graph. Another line for blowjobs as well that would peter along the bottom


If I live to a million and have my hands cut off


Yeah. I think I’ve passed that point.


Think you’ve got blowjobs mixed up with another sex act there, pal.


to which column are we scoring non-self-administered hand relief?


You’re going to let something as insignificant as having no hands stop you?


To your own column, I’d presume


It's thursday so we should probably be filthy

Easily. I’m always having sex.


trying to estimate the number of times I’ve debased myself in my own company is… dizzying. I don’t know if I’ve done anything that many times.




So many questions. Why does sex fall at 45? Will you still be having 100 wanks a year at 75?


Peak blowjob between 45 and 55!


Ooooh yes


That’s the year you got a couple of ribs removed