Early Monday thread

No work until 5pm today. Got a few things to do around the house but mostly just more King of the Hill, fish finger sandwiches and hanging out with this little lady.


Winning. What sauce are you having with them?

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Not sure if there’s any mayo in the house which makes my decision easier. Ketchup, thick white bread, couple of slices o’cheese.


Anyone want to go do my hearing for me? You only need to say “I would like to rely on my written arguments”, they’ll refuse the application, and you then have the rest of the day to take in the delights of The Hague. You just need to be at Stansted by lunchtime.

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Had one of them situations where I woke up this morning and fell back asleep for about half an hour but had a dream that felt like hoooouuurrrss. I was hosting a party or something, and everytime I left the room, the set-up would change and I couldn’t find my keys. It feels weird currently sitting in the living room having scoured the version of it in my mind for my keys.

Going to collect my train ticks in a bit. Going to that London tomorrow (if I’d prepared in advance, I’d have made a shirt that says “Hello LME” on it or something)

Decent - i’m a salad creamer myself for an ffs

Oh fuck off ‘quirky’ tech company

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Never been a fan. The TV will smother hers in it though I reckon.

I am at work now. Cannot be arsed.

Coffee and faffing, then.

Horrible night last night
Fucking crap this morn
gun gun gun gun gun gun

Decided I’d be fine without a jacket for my 20 minute walk this morning, only went and snowed didn’t it?


Stupid cat woke me twice in the night/morning wanting to go out at 4am and in at 7am. Imagine having a cat flap!

Honestly considering leaving the country over the quantity of insane, pointless paperwork you need here to do the most simple things.

Bring on Brexit, lads

Didn’t know you had moved to Ireland.

Oh God, I’m sobering up!

Have a document saying ‘profk has the right to healthcare’, which apparently isn’t sufficient to obtain the right to healthcare

FINE, guess I better pack.

Monday’s child can get tae fuck.

Not feeling it this morning m9s. Had a very broken night’s sleep. Bouyed slightly by my decision to get an early bird Field Day ticket now the saturday lineup’s been announced.

Got accused of being a bullying skank with gonorrhoea in a Countdown group last night because I made a contextually valid crude joke referencing something the OP had recently said.
Apparently me making the joke in the first place was the real problem, rather than me being unnecessarily attacked by a shitstirring puritan cunt who is constantly telling feminazis to lighten up on Twitter. Didn’t sleep well afterwards. Exhausted from dealing with people’s shit.


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