Pincernt Kompany
Jaap Clam
Negligible sen-Essien-ce
Stanislav Lobstertka
Marek Clamsik
Lobsterlu Lukaku
Gary Limpet-er
Arthropodolski
Crispiano Clamaldo
Lee Cattermollusc
Adrien Crabiot
also turns out the collective noun for Lobsters is a risk, which is nice and apt
Harry Winkle!
If there’s one thing I hate more than the England team it’s a plucky home nation feelgood story. The international equivalent of an FA cup tie where one team’s goalkeeper is a plumber. Football’s the worst.
Wayne Rooney
(Barnacle)
Razor (clam) Ruddock
Ray Whelkins
Edinson Caviarni
Roberto sole-dado
Marton Scallop