Extremely boring yet quite severe injuries which have befallen you, or vice versa.

Following on from my post in the evening thread that I’m sure you’ve all read by now, I realised that in my life I’ve had some quite serious or dramatic-looking injuries, not a single one of which has had an interesting story behind it;

- Broke my metatarsal and was unable to walk for 6 months due to a mild slip on the stairs, stone-cold sober.
- Lost Quite A Lot of blood today by somehow managing to take a chunk out of my thumb whilst softly closing the boot of my car.
- Have dislocated my shoulder numerous times sneezing.

Come on DiS, regale me with tales of how you were on crutches for a year because you slept a bit wonky, or conversely how you Felix Baumgartner’d without a parachute and got away with a broken nail.

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Tipped a saucepan of soup over my head and face aged about 2.

Should have fairly terrible burns but somehow got away with it.

Is this the kind of thing you are after??

Was playing football in my friend’s driveway, dived to make a save, made the save, landed on my arm, broke it so badly it took six years and some surgery to heal.

because there were two bone cysts in it so it was basically papier maché

Stabbed myself most of the way through my finger in February when trying to prise something out of a container with a vegetable knife. Immediately before stabbing myself I had thought “better be careful doing this or I might stab myself”

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when I was about 10 or so I ran through the kitchen and crashed into my dad and a pot of boiling potato, and scalded half my face, shoulder, and back. pretty lucky it didnt scar.

dont run

Heh! That’s reminded me of yet another of mine; had just bought a new bread knife, big 12" (don’t) serrated thing. Distinctly remember thinking to myself before cutting into the delicious crusty loaf I’d bought alongside it “Right, numbers, careful now.”

Was in hospital probably 20 minutes later.

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Stood on a drawing pin a few years ago. It hurt but I pulled it out and got on with my life. A few weeks later my foot started to really hurt, it was agony to put weight on it, it was swollen, it felt like I’d broken a bone but I had no idea how I’d done it.

I went to A&E and they took an x ray, turns out I hadn’t actually pulled the pin out. I’d taken the top off the pin but left the actual pin in place where it had embedded itself in a bone in my foot. I had to have an operation to remove the pin, take a course of really powerful antibiotics and wear one of those stupid space boots for three weeks while it was healing.

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That definitely falls into the ‘jammy bugger’ side of the thread! Do you remember it? Obviously don’t want to trigger any PTSD here so feel free not to answer that!

I grimaced reading that, so not sure it qualifies for the thread. It’s both nasty and had fairly serious consequences. Although all you were doing was playing football. BUT you were in goal. On the fence with this one.

Mentioned this before on another thread but once cut my thumb on a fingernail pulling up my trousers at the toilet. Walked back into the office with blood pouring from it

That’s the stuff! Hospital?

Once broke my finger trying to swat a fly.

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Bad sprained ankle slipping down all of two stairs.

Caught a quick, inadvertent knee to the groin playing basketball. Inexplicably played for another 15 or so minutes on pure adrenaline, even more inexplicably walked a couple miles when I got home to buy Oceania from a local Best Buy, and somehow even more inexplicably walked 7 miles to and 7 miles back from the resulting doctor appointment.

Needless to say, the result of all of this was nothing short of grotesque and led to years of pain from damaged nerves and wondering if I’d ever be able to properly exercise again.

First aid box

Working in Asda, had the happy notion of stacking the second bread trolley on top of the empty pallets to avoid making two trips to the warehouse, a bit of rust fell off it into my eye and I had to spend eight hours in casualty and have my eyeball shaved.

Wasn’t that serious though, was fine after a few days.

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5 years old
Curiosity got the better of me while my mum was out of the kitchen
Touched the rollers on the electric mangle
Basically mangled my right hand
Broken bones galore
Fortunately no lasting damage
Right hand has been very useful as I grew up

Oh, one time my shoe developed a giant hole along my ankle and I was too depressed to deal with buying new shoes - I ended up getting a massive blister, which constantly would get reopened by the edges of the hole, which led to infection with red lines going up to my knee and having to get it drained at urgent care.

Kept wearing the shoes for awhile after.

image

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Broke my hand last year at my friend’s house. Was admittedly quite drunk but it wasn’t a wild affair, we were playing card games and I got up to make another drink, tripped over my shadow and broke my fall by punching her granite breakfast bar.
Shrugged it off until the morning, woke up to my hand three times the size it normally is, went to a&e still thinking it was fine and I was wasting their time and nope, broken in two places.

If it was Spoons then you’re disqualified from the thread, otherwise outstanding effort.

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