Feel like I want to get a snake

Like a ball python or something. Find them quite relaxing and like to hold them. Put me off getting a snake and tell me why it’s cruel and evil.
Obviously If I got one I would keep it in the garage of where we are moving as having reptiles or fish in your living room/any room in your house is uncouth and am a massive snob about that

Don’t be that guy


My weird friend Tony got a snake recently. He is very much that guy.

My little brother has turned into one of those lizard guys, it’s disappointing to say the least

He’s married into the royal family? Congratulations!!!

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wanted an octopus til i realised they only live for 3 years, not worth it at all

Paint some flames on your car bonnet too.


It’s definitely out of character. I’m basically a boring suit…with a snake? Could work!*
*I’ll just say my 2 year old wanted one!

Could get a nice leather waistcoat as well

This is getting a bit mean spirited, sorry Wiggsy, get yourself a snake if it will make you happy


How about if I just have one snake, that I never, ever talk about and it lives in the garage…and I don’t wear any tiedye. That’s ok, right?

Alright Fritzl

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Yeah, don’t do it.

They don’t have to be live, can just keep them in the freezer, next to my wife’s vegetarian meals

Also, when people come to the door I can be wearing the snake around my neck!! And it can crawl up onto my fedora


Surely they’re one of the least edgy pets?! Hahahababahahabhahha