What’s it all about then? Just seen they’ve taken an ad out in a paper to say “We’re actually good” which doesn’t sound very secret for a secret society.

One of the lads on that Hunted programme is one and keeps using his contacts to be helped out and it’s all right in the middle of where I grew up and my Granddad always used to go on about the masons either giving him loads of work or taking work away from him or something.

What do you know about em? Are you one of em?

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they stopped catholics in my area from buying property, so fuck em

My ex’s dad is one and kept trying to recruit me. I’ve been to one lunch with them, not because I was interested, but for the sake of an easy life.

It’s a sad lonely old men’s club that’s also useful for getting ahead in life. I asked the old codgers at the lunch what they got out of it, and they mostly said “companionship”. One of them said that it’s good to know you can go anywhere in the world and if you see someone with the lapel pin then you know you have something in common with them. I wondered why you couldn’t just pretend to like football like everybody else does.

My ex’s dad was an independent contractor in his field and used to get letters offering work from people he’d never met. If they started “Dear Brother [redacted]”, it was through the Freemasons.



My most recent driving instructor also tried to recruit me. Fuck off, Freemasons.

What about you do you think it is that attracts Freemasons to you?

My grandad was one, don’t know anything about it, a friend is in the oto which seems like a more hardcore version

Quite racist aren’t they

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I’ve never heard of the oto, what’s that?

Probably want to bum me, they’re only human.

(because I’ve got an extremely privileged educational and now professional background and I suppose they think I’d be useful to have in their network of contacts)


Don’t think it’s too mokery to suggest tradesmen tend to band together either. It’s the papier mache shrines that are the most amusing part.

Looks mad that

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My Granddad was a tradesman and I can’t remember if he was pro or anti-masons

They don’t fuck around with the whole “your loyalty is to us above all else” thing, either. While my ex’s dad was trying to recruit me he was also refusing to nominate his own son, because he didn’t have anything to contribute and was transparently in it to get a leg up in life.

Stone fucking cold.

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Would his son have beaten you in an arm wrestle do you think?

Great handshakes though, like Giggseh and Ince back in the 90s.

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Nah, he’s even more of a noodle armed Quentin than I am.

Know little about them. Didn’t they start as essentially labour unions for people with specific skills e.g. stonemasons.