truly the high point of Bob Hoskins’s career
sound guy, can you turn the keyboards up a bit mate
Oofft, shit that they’re not actually singing tho! I mean… why am I surprised?
Christ on a bike that’s cringey
Omg just got to the part with the random bloke
That’s Brandon Block! Nice of Ronnie to threaten him by getting Vinnie Jones on him, lovely man.
ROSCOE AND MARLON BREXIT ENTER THE DRAGON
ROSCOE: hello welcome to the Brexit Awards coverage, covering all the latest Brexit news.
MARLON: But first here is David Davis with David Davis’ Picture House Segment.
DAVID DAVIS: Hi, I’m David Davis, live from an old pierside picture house in this seaside town that I am nostaglic for despite being an ardent supporter of the ideology / economic policies that bought total ruination to this particular region. I’m certainly not at one of those decadent American drive-ins supping a milkshake, or at a European arthouse cinema watching films with a bunch of gays in it who cut their own eyes off or something. No, I’m at a proper British cinema eating a fish and a chip with Rag 'n Bone Man for some reason, because M-B thinks he’s a fun character to write.
RAG N BONE: Glad to be here.
DAVID DAVIS: Yes and today–
RAG N BONE: Just nice to put your feet up sometimes, isn’t it?
DAVID DAVIS: Yes. (beat) Anyway, let’s get cracking with our chat about some of the top films out there and to what extent they will resemble Brexit.
RAG N BONE: First up, it’s Logan’s Run
DAVID DAVIS: That’s right. This is a film that Brexit SO won’t be like! You can bet that there will be loads of old people in Brexit Britain all over the place with their charming stories about how the contribution they made to the War Effort as children and / or embryoes was instrumental to seizing back our sovereignty.
RAG N BONE: And next up, Soccer Dog
DAVID DAVIS: Ah, Tony Giglio’s directorial debut feature Soccer Dog. Remember, viewers! This film is not to be confused with its certainly very un-Brexit Britain sequel, Soccer Dog: European Cup! The original, though, exceeds its sequel in every respect. My only complaint is that it’s not called Football Dog. Overlooked at Cannes upon release, but a film that will surely be looked at as one that predicted Brexit Britain’s future prosperity in the world of sport. (light chortle) Though of course, our football future won’t be secured by dogs.
RAG N BONE: Our sportsmen are only human after all
MARLON: Well that was a satisfying closing part of David Davis’ segment
ROSCOE: I think that’s the last time that any project headed by David Davis will reach a satisfying and coherent conclusion
MARLON: We’ve really returned to form, Roscoe
ROSCOE: Don’t jinx it