Fucking state of this

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never heard Cod Bites & Chips, are they any good?

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Suppose if it keeps a venue open fair enough at the moment. I wonder if it just isn’t viable for bands to do this type of thing.

On the other hand a tribute band and a “bottomless brunch” is just hell.

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Tables only
Socially distanced
Limited capacity
Cod bites ft. Chips

£6/5 NUS

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What I wouldn’t give to go to a bottomless brunch as an oasis tribute band play a rousing rendition of ‘D’You Know What I Mean’

*bottomless rum punch

The brunch and the bottomless being not next to each other confused the fuck out of me.

Try as I might I can’t get annoyed about this.

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nah, all been done before. Just dressed up as something new.

ROSCOE: Waiter waiter

WAITER: Yes

ROSCOE: There’s something wrong with my burger it’s all just fell on the fucking floor

WAITER: It’s a bottomless burger so there’s only bread at the top

MARLON: Oh em gee you are so embarrassing you don’t get bottomless food

ROSCOE: Fuckin hipster trends man

NOASIS: Oh yeah / Definitely I need to know / How your garden recedes / Cause I don’t wanna fly / Long ago, did you never feel the healing effects / In the afternoon sun / As it dries me to the flesh

ROSCOE: And this fucking Noasis band, the joke is really poorly realised and doesn’t work. Just eating some soggy bread while looking at dismay at the burger innards strewn about the floor and listening to this laboured shite

NOASIS: Definitely I need to stay grounded / Wanna die, don’t wanna live / Definitely I want to drown / Definitely I believe everything / Maybe I’m different to you / We hear things they always hear / Me and you are going to die finitely

MARLON: Oh lighten up Roscoe this sort of shit is the panacea of the nation

NOASIS: Ey thanks for that song, we love Blur and now we’s gonna play a few more numbers - “He’s Acoustic” follered by a few choons from our album “Sitting on the Perineum of an Elf”

ROSCOE: Absolutely fucking not

MARLON: At least the Noel one is passionate about limiting the spread of the novel coronavirus covid 19

ROSCOE: I can’t tell them apart, which is Yessel and which is Truthis

WAITER: Was it really worth editing to make that extra joke

ROSCOE y

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I’ll bet that the rum element of the punch is homoeopathic if one pint is the equivalent offer

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This brunch, do you reckon you get a roll with it?

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Booked!

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Later, at The Electric Ballroom

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Can’t believe none of the ire has been aimed at the fact that apparently 12 till 5pm is classed as brunch time

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Got to admit though my fascination with tribute acts and their names leads me down some youtube holes

£35 each/£200 for table of 6…

I want a lot of cod bites for that please

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As i said to my mates, surely that’s afternoon tea…

Also the bottlomless punch is only from 12-1 when presumably half the crowd will still be outside, unless doors are at 8am…

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Don’t like thinking about cod with no bottoms

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Can we all chip in and send someone to this please? Busting to see a picture of Adidas man, in his late 40s, who still likes the idea of indie discos getting stuck into a child’s party meal whilst drinking a pint of Carling, and with fake-Liam giving it V-signs in the background.

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