Games invented to get you to fuck off/shut up when you were a kid


from the playground games thread:
“not a playground game but in a similar vein to ‘fuck off and calm down, you twats’ (sleeping lions), my mam would give me a paintbrush and some water and tell me to paint the back of the house. obviously by the time i’d be finished with my section, it’d be dry so i’d start again.”


my best mate’s mum would say ‘i’m going to hold up my fist. could you all run into it because i can’t be bothered to hit you all’


My dad called it “pissing about in the garage until Gladiators”. But it was his game not ours.


“Let’s see who can be silent for the longest” obvs


my parents managed to con me into reading captain underpants relentlessly, and having no friends where I lived really helped keep things quiet.

  • silence in the courtyard, silence in the street, the biggest X in Y is just about to speak
  • other

0 voters


I would never have been stupid enough to have fallen for that paintbrush scam, sorry man.

Remember my grandad warning me that the neighbourhood cat would bite my dick off if I went near the door (sounds less weird in Spanish). Cant for the life of me think why he didn’t want me to go near the door, but it worked.


i was aged 3 - 5 at the time.


my point stands.


mainly drew pictures tbh