Good anecdotes


I just remembered a good one:

A couple of my friends at work, Adam and Aaron, were both in the office fairly late of an evening. Adam walked into Aaron’s office and loudly proposed, “Hey, douchebag - are we going to the pub?” Aaron immediately scrambled for the mute button on his phone and shouted back, “I’m on a call, you fucking dickhead!”

Unfortunately, it turned out that Aaron had missed the mute button.

There were apparently about a dozen other people on the conference call.


Don’t know any


Once when we were at college there was a lad who had lied about his age to get a cheap Metro pass. Apparently they didn’t really check. So for absolute shabs we prepared a poster on tyne and wear transport headed paper saying there was a fake pass amnesty and anyone who had a fake pass could turn it in and would not face prosecution. At the bottom there were loads of made up pass serial numbers plus his.

We stuck a few up around the building and then alerted him to it. He got scared and headed off to the civic centre to turn his fake pass in and we all sipped heartily from the banter decanter.

Later I was describing the amusing event to my mum and she said “oh I’ve just read about something like that in the Evening Chronicle”. I had to dig the paper out of the bin where it was wrapped around some potato peelings and there it was “Police Probe Fake Ticket Hoax Letter”. totally shat it naturally.

Got interviewed by the police a few days later with full “you have the right to remain silent” treatment (which dates the story I guess) - the cop was very nice and basically told me not to be a bellend for a bit.




you are a pedo.