Well, have you?
We have mismatched cutlery and crockery, but it’s mostly the cutlery that I mock. Fuck off Big Fork, nobody likes you.
did once berate a plate
Once made a mug of a mug
Our flat has very ugly 70s inspired plates, which are too ugly to eat off. They are mocked
Shoved a glass up my arse
I did lampoon a spoon
I’m just going to have to check if mug comes under crockery, will get back to you on this one.
Took the piss out of a knife for fish
Have you ever wronged a tong?
Got caught banting a flan tin
I once arrived late with a side plate
Not me, but this dolphin I know smashed some porcelain with it’s dorsal fin
He’s Greek, he’s great
He’ll smash your dinner plate
Been known to troll a bowl
I once talked pish to a dish
Pwned a pizza stone
Wrestled a pestle and slaughtered the mortar