Have you ever set fire to anything?

I don’t think I have yknow, at least not on purpose.

I did once accidentally put a tissue box on top of a lit tealight once, but luckily there was someone next to me to extinguish it as I squealed

:police_car: :police_car: :police_car:


We use to go into the woods and tie bin bags to trees and set fire to them (the bags not the trees)

There really was nothing to do where I grew up


But yes, yes I have. Mainly garden waste though, nothing exciting, except [redacted]


Also a lot of lynx flame-throwers


Used to start big bonfires in underpasses.

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but serious answer, yes, every time my parents went out for a few minutes as a teenager.

Became a running joke that my parents would come back and smell smoke in the house.



… but I did have a phase of getting back from school when I was about 13 and I was briefly, like a 15 minute window, on my own in the house.

I’d open the back door, take an egg from the fridge and throw it as hard as I could over the gardens in the grove. I never once heard an “Aaarrrgghh” which was disappointing.

Stopped doing it after about a year.


Yes, twice :pensive:

First time was in the lab during my 3rd year at uni. Was supposed to be injecting a dead variant of influenza a into a bunch of chicken eggs and didn’t realise my egg box was pushing the bunsen burners into the electrical outlets until i heard the alarm and looked up to see flames. I froze, and the lecturer supervising me sprayed it and we left. Whole building was evacuated and as the fire engines came, the head of department elbowed me jovially and laughed about me starting the fire. I was devastated. As a bunch of first years were downstairs in another lab, i hoped that it would have been assumed that it was them. The only good thing was my time in the lab was just me and the lecturer because i was catching up on my own because i missed the last lab (big headache after a japanddroids/place to bury strangers concert)

Second time i was making chips at home and forgot the oil on the fire because my cat was being cute outside. Came back indoors to a column of fire from the pot into the hood. As usual, i froze, but managed to screech for my mum who came in and put it out with a fire blanket and called 999. Spent the whole night cleaning up the blackened soot and firefighter water/foam sludge and had to bin the cooker

Thankfully nobody was hurt

:fire: :pensive: :fire:


My brothers curtains when I was smoking a teabag in his room.


Oh and my lovely wall hanging when a candle toppled onto it last winter. Hoping the massive melted black hole in it adds to its charm and serves as a reminder to never leave a candle unattended

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A chelsea kit with ‘TERRY 26’ on the back after having to wear it on my stag do :fire: :fire: :fire: :fire:


Last year i accidentally set fire to my hair when lighting a candle, noticed promptly and put it out so little damage thankfully, but my hairdresser had fun blending that into my hair, and the smell haunted the house for hours.

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My friend’s leg at Leeds festival when I was 17…

Or so I believed for many years! Woke up one morning at the festival still very drunk and no idea what had gone on the night before but there were massive scorch marks on the ground and evidence of lots of fire. I had a hazy memory of lots of fire and messing about with it and the festival security telling us off and putting out the fire. Our friend’s tent was gone so I asked my other friends where they’d gone and they told me they’d had to go to hospital because I’d set fire to this one guy’s leg and that’s why security came. I was obviously horrified and text him to say sorry about the fire and hope he was ok and he never replied😬 sometimes saw him out and about and he didn’t look like he had lasting damage but I could tell he didn’t want anything to do with me so I left it alone. Racked with guilt about it for about 10 years until my friend revealed that he’d made up the leg on fire bit, the guy had just left because he found us annoying and he’d had enough of the festival. Fucking dick making me guilty for so long.

Same guy had me convinced for many years I’d phoned 999 when drunk because a cashpoint didn’t give me any cash when it said it had. Huge guilt about wasting emergency services’ time for years, but after the leg incident was revealed to have been a hoax I gave it more thought and worked out I’d actually rang the number on the cash machine.


Had a bonfire in our garden one fireworks night (I was about 11) and I decided it’d be a good idea to burn some offcuts of linoleum on it until the next door neighbour complained that the acrid smoke had poisoned his budgies*.

*not a euphemism

Yes, absolutely.

Lynx cans, closed pop bottles, wood.

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Some of the older people in my partner’s family are the kind of people who don’t really believe anything is truly destroyed unless it’s burned. They’re less mobile than they used to be too, which means we end up being presented with a massive box of bank statements from 1983 or something to burn in the dustbin they bought for this exact purpose every time we visit. It’s quite cathartic to start but just feels like admin after a while.


fuck! where’s THAT dis picture? someone must have it


2010 election?

so that’s halfway between now and France '98

Run Away Snow White GIF

(edit: cos I quote something I didn’t meant to causing the post to make no sense haha)