Help maosm stay alive in the death trap that is Australia

ozdeathtrap

#22

Don’t talk about sport. They’re total dicks when it comes to sport.


#23

Move to New Zealand. Supposed to be quite nice.


#24

Cats are unaffected by the bite of the funnelweb spider.

So either

A) get a cat to keep them at bay
B) don’t get a cat if you don’t want injured, angry funnelwebs being deposited on your bed as a gift


#25

Put on an australian accent, say things like g’day sport, put another shrimp on the barbie and what a pulava. You don’t want to look out of place there.


#26

c) Become a cat.


#27

Show your respect to the locals by learning the national anthem (which is the jingle from Sheila’s Wheels).


#28

d) get bitten by a radioactive cat and become CATMAN


#29

Take notes


#30

Don’t go jogging in Melbourne


#31

Waltzing Matilda - I think u will find


#32

Thank you saps. Would it not be cowardly to run?


#33

I did this the first time, my cycling helmet looking like a nautical mine, but then at a set of traffic lights some other cyclist said “THEY DOWNT DIUR NATHIN MAAAITTTE. WAAISSTA TAAAAIIIRM.” and being one to buckle to peer pressure, I took them out when I got home.


#34

Sounds like I may be a shark.


#35

Those come to tree eyes


#36

Most of these suggestions have been tough but reasonable. This one is just impossible.


#37

Be careful to see how many shrimps are on the barbie before adding more


#38

Pretty much true at the moment, got up to 42 degrees celcius on the weekend,


#39

I’ve already done this one!!


#40

Quite possibly, but I recommend it.


#41

Sounds unpatriotic